


The horror inside

by Ematiger



Category: Diabolik Lovers
Genre: Asexual Character, Comedy, Creepy Fluff, Human, Humor, Other, Suggestive Themes, Torture, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-06
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2019-06-22 20:36:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 33,934
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15590223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ematiger/pseuds/Ematiger
Summary: "Life inside the mansion with six sadistic brothers is not as horrible as I thought it would be. Who thought that living with them might be a good idea? My parents. Why? This question will be answered eventually."Diabolik Lovers fanfiction. This book is dedicated to comedy.





	1. The savior

I was running through a long and dark hallway trying to escape from terrifying fate that has been chasing me. The only things that I could hear were my heartbeat and heavy breathing as I was still trying to run. Even if it was hopeless I still had to try... I had to.

But I made one wrong turn and I met a dead end. "It can't be...", I whispered. At the end of the hallway I saw brownish door, but I had a really bad feeling about this room. As if devil himself was lurking and waiting for an innocent victim to step into his territory to be eaten alive.

The sound of steps echoed through the mansion. This sound was following me whenever I ran. There was no escape from this anxiety triggering clacking. I prayed to all gods I knew to be saved. I had no other choice but to slowly make my way towards the door.

To my horror the sound of steps was getting  louder and louder, meaning that the predator has found me. Every single step I heard felt like a punch to my ribcage, making it harder and harder to breathe. I tried to control this fear that could turn into a panic attack. I tried to focus my attention on escaping. I just needed more time. More time and I would be able to...

"Nfu~ Biiiitch-chaaaan~"

Cold sweat covered me all in a blink of an eye. Panic that I was able to control now hit me like an enormous tsunami. That sickly sweet voice oh his pierced me like a sword. I felt like a cornered pig that was about to be butchered. So I did what all stupid people do in the horror movies - I hid in the closet that just happened to be there in a hallway.

"Bitch-chan, come out come out wherever you are~"

This song... This melody... No! I have to control myself! Ignore him. Ignore him! I have to refuse my urges at all cost!

"I know you're there I know you are~"

"I'M ACE," I yelled out while jumping out of the closet. "Do you get it? Cause it's a closet and you were telling me to come out and... Wait... Oh shit."I totally forgot about the danger I was in! Now I was dead girl for sure. Oh damn it.

"Nfu~ I just knew that you wouldn't miss out this opportunity." 

"Ups, I did it again..."

"Hmm, let's just say that you came out at the wrong time. Now, my beloved little one,  stop playing hide and seek and submit me your blood. If you are a good Bitch-chan, I might even reward you with a date."

My fear turned into sass.

"Dude, I literally just jumped out of that thing, ya know." I pointed at the closet.

"And that's why a date would be just you, me and my recent lover Vanessa."

"Not interested!" I stuck out my palm.

"Vanessa, who happens to own a puppy."

"A puppy..? NO! I don't want to be bitten." I had to escape, although I really didn't want to go into that mysterious room, I had no other choice. I ran inside the room, slamming door behind me as hard as I could. I took a look around. This room seemed to be awfully familiar... I think I was here once or twice, but how..?

"Nfu~ Out of all rooms, you had  to choose mine. Didn't fate itself bring you here, hm~ ?"

My head snapped towards his voice. He was laying in bed, smirking and twirling keys on his finger.

At this point my eyes were as wide as the full moon. I've tried to open the damn thing, but it was locked. "No... No no no no! Let me out!"

The bastard was laughing. "You won't leave this room, not until you pay for the key".

Yet again he was in front of me, but I had no time to react when I felt my back hit something smooth. I was no longer standing in front of his room door, I was on his bed. One moment my hands were on a doorknob, and the other - he had them pinned down above my head.

The sound of something clicking brought me out of my thoughts. 

My eyes widened when I realized it - he used handcuffs on me. Not only that, but he also cuffed himself to me, trapping us to his bead. I thought that this was Reiji's thing, but guess I was wrong.   
I tried to move my legs so I could kick him off, but he was too heavy. Not that kicking him off would work in this situation anyways.

"Ahhh what a shame - I won't be able to use your thighs, guess I will have to search for another soft spot to bite into," He said this with a fake pout on his face while unlacing ribbon on my uniform.

"Y-you know... Ayato calls me Titless for a reason," I laughed nervously. "I don't have any soft spots so let me go!"   
"One does not know until one tries, Bitch-chan~"

He was already leaning towards my skin. I felt his tongue going down from my neck. My full attention was on how to not burst in tears, but I could't control myself once I saw something on the ceiling. The moment I noticed it, I let out an ear-splitting scream. An entire mansion drowned in the sound of my voice.

"Shouldn't you be screaming like that THE MOMENT I bite you and not now?" Laito asked irritated.

But I had no time for his words, I didn't even see that red haired vampire who still had his fedora on and was on top of me. My focus was on that demon that was getting closer and closer to us. I started trashing around in a vain attempt to escape that creature. My cheeks were wet from tears. This finally got Laito's attention.

"I've never seen you like this before~ Ohhh if I knew a bit earlier that you were capable of doing such an expression~" He said while blushing. "If you won't stop looking like that, I might do even more than just take your blood, Little one~"

I did not react to his words, my eyes were following that monster. The more I was trying to struggle and escape, the closer it got to us.

Laito finally noticed that my eyes were not on him. Now he had a real pout.

"Are you ignoring me? And where are you looking anyways..." he said while following my gaze. Once he noticed it - he became paler than a pile of fresh snow. With terror in his eyes he turned to face me. I looked at him and he looked at me. Then we screamed in a perfect synchrony.

"SPIDER!!!!!!!!"

That damn thing was about to land on the end of the bed. Noticing that, Laito and I pressed our backs against headboard. But that eight-legged monster from hell was slowly crawling towards us.

"UNLOCK THIS DAMN THING!!!!" I screamed. We both were trying to get away from handcuffs.

"I don't know where the key is!" Laito's voice was no longer nauseously sweet. His voice was a voice of a child who's about to be scolded for bad grades or destroyed window.

"Bitch-chan, what do we do?" I saw something shining in his eyes. I could't believe my eyes - the almighty king of all sadistic perverts was about to cry. He looked like a small child. Even though I hated kids or vampires, my motherly instinct kicked in.

"I-it's okay, I will save you. You w-will be fine." But what was I supposed to do? That pawn of Claude was getting closer and closer. Then I got an idea.

"Laito, give me your hat."  
"It's not a hat, it's fedora and why do you need it?"  
I had no time to explain so I just snatched it from his head. I pulled on my cuffs so Laito would be closer to the wall and behind me. And I waited.

"Bitch-chan, it's getting closer."  
"Shhhhh, I know what to do."  
When that tyrant was close enough, I placed the hat over it, trapping it under it.

"Now we have to get the hell out of here. Where is the key?"

"On the floor next to the door."   
"Damn it, we can't reach it."   
To our relief we heard steps. Someone was coming this way! Doorknob went down and a white haired boy entered the room.  
"Why the hell are you screaming so loudly in here, I can't sleep because of you two..." he took a good look the two of us, handcuffed together to the bed. Our clothes were messy, our hair was all over the place. He stared at us for about two seconds and left us alone.

"WAIT! NO! COME BACK - WE NEED YOU!"   
"Perverts." Was the last thing we could hear before door was slammed shut. But we had some luck, because the force of that slam was enough to bring keys into a reachable spot. With my foot I picked them up and gave them to Laito, while pressing the hat down to the bed. He unlocked us and jumped out of bed.   
"What do we do now?" he asked.  
"I need a syringe."

I placed a book on the hat and we both left the room. Our plan was simple - Laito lures Reiji out of his room and I get a syringe and some insecticide. Even though we had some trouble, our plan was successful in th end. But it's a story for another time.

It had a very small amount of white liquid, but it would be enough to finish off that bastard. Laito was already impatiently waiting for me.

"What are you going to do with this?" Asked Laito.  
"You'll see." We walked back into his room. I prepared syringe and stabbed it into his hat. The needle went all the way in. Then I let out the poison to do its thing.

"Now we wait," I said. Laito was sitting in the furthest corner of his room. Of course I was in a same corner with him, because... you know... Spiders. We checked that corner before and it was spider free so don't worry.

And so ten minutes passed, slowly, filling us up with anxiety, but they passed.

"Bitch-chan, is it dead?"  
"I don't know."  
"C-can you check?"  
"Okay, but gimme your shoe."  
"Why?"  
"Just in case."  
"Can't you use yours?"   
"Do you remember how you threw my shoes into a pool so I wouldn't be able to run fast?"  
"Right foot or left?"  
"Doesn't matter."

He took off his shoe and gave it to me. I took it and stood up, preparing for an upcoming battle with a monster.   
"Well - round two it is." I carefully removed the book from the fedora and shakily placed it on the night stand. I gently put my left hand on the hat while clutching his shoe with my right. 

"H-here we go," I shakily whispered and raised the hat. And there was our demon - twisting and shaking, trying to fight for its life that it was losing rapidly. For a second I was thinking about crushing it with a shoe, but I changed my mind. Spider was big and I still had some insecticide inside syringe. So I picked up that needle and gave this poor spider a last injection. He started to shake even more, but only for ten seconds. Then it was dead. With a help of a shoe, I rolled that dead bastard on the book, walked towards the bathroom and flushed it down the toilet.

"And it's done." I faced Laito with a smile. Relief was all over his face.  
"Nfu, my Slayer-chan did something amazing today, but it's still not over yet~"  
I raised my eyebrow. "How so?"

All five brothers smelled something coming from the outside. It got all of their attention. All of the brothers took a look outside and once they did, they screamed.

"WHY THE HELL ARE THESE TWO BURNING A BED IN OUR YARD?!"

* * *

 

(So this is a first story I wrote for Diabolik Lovers fandom and second story, like ever. 


	2. Luring the beast out of his cave

The warriors. The knights of the darkness. One fights in the name of Light and the other - for the puns.

Yes - it was me and Laito. And today we had a mission - to get Reiji out of his room so I could steal... I mean borrow something that I needed for an exorcism of fedora. But the problem was - how in the world were we supposed to do that?

There was one time I needed a potion that would turn everything you ate taste bitter. Especially if the original flavour was sweet. The reason? Revenge on the hysterical bastard who ate all of my ice-cream! Being a poison genius he was, Reiji had this kind of thing in his room. But did I get my sweet revenge? No, because even touching that cursed bottle made my situation very bitter - a night in the dungeons with that 'so watch me whip' vampire. And let's just say that he's not that gentle.

So, this time I had to do it like a ninja. And this time I had a pretty good comrade by my side. I didn't want to admit it, but Laito was pretty damn good at convincing people to do what he wanted them to do. Bastard stole away my girlfriend... ON THE VERY FIRST NIGHT I GOT INTO THIS DAMN HOUSE. So I figured out that if I didn't want to be cheated on - I should stay single. Long story short - Laito would do the talking and I would do the other things.

Back to the main story of the night. The plan was simple:  
1) I do something stupid to get called into Reiji's room;  
2) I recieve punishment from Sebastian wannabe;  
3) 10 minutes later Laito comes in and gets Reiji distracted so I could take what I need;  
4) I leave Reiji's room with stuff I took in secret.

Simple, right? Smiling toothless fortune says 'Girl. think again!'.

"It has to be fast, stupid enough to draw his attention, but not too stupid so he wouldn't have to punish me all night long. Yeah no. Not in THAT way, you pervert." I cut Laito off before he could even say a word, but his smirk said it all. Because Laito's room was being ruled by a spider and my room still had some holes from the last stupid thing that happened to Subaru, we had to find hideout to plot our scheme. Kitchen was perfect.

"Nfu~, Bitch-chan, who would've thought that you, of all people, would be lacking stupidity right now. I thought that being stupid is like your second nature."

"Oh shut up you. I am sure that my head will cook something up... THAT'S IT!" I shot up from my chair, slamming my hands on the table, knocking the chair down. "I will cook something," I said in victorious voice.

His usual smirk deepened. "I knew that you could do it, Bitch-chan~."  
"And I will do it *DUM DUM DUMMM* WITHOUT A COOKING BOOK." Laito's eyes widened in pure shock.

"Oh look at the time," He looked at his non-existent watch. "I have a few things to do. Good luck, Bitch-chan~" And he was gone. Lil' bastard. So now all I had to do was make food and not explosives. Easy. I think pancakes should be fine. Third time never lies, you know.

Sound of items splashing all over the place, tools clanking together and the sound of baking batter splashing around were in a perfect synchrony with the smoke coming out of the pan.

I had been trying to bake tasty pancakes, I swear, but here I was, sitting in my own failure like a puppy in its puddle. I was able to make one pancake that was edible and not burned to crisp. I gently put it on the nicest plate I could find and all I was left with was waiting.

STEP ONE

Meanwhile in Reiji's room.

Okay... Steady... Steady.. I think that I will be able to finally create the potion to make that dead-beat deaf. I only have to pour this carefully. One drop. Only one drop and that good-for-nothing will suffer. I can already see that expression of desperation on his face as his only pleasure in life is fading away...

A horrendous noise of metal clashing together echoed through an entire mansion.

My hand shook a little. I was used to the crashing sounds in this mansion like a fish was used to fingers tapping to its aquarium walls. But this time sound was somewhat different. It didn't come from Subaru's direction. It came from the kitchen.

Suddenly, my potion started smoking. I looked down and instead of one drop, I had poured everything that was in a bottle. What a waste. I sighed as I poured the whole thing into a teapot. Let's see what kind of impact this will have on that annoying girl.

Fearing for the worst I head out towards our kitchen. Whipping or blood sucking? Which punishment should I use today. Maybe I should ask Ayato for some toys of his or tell Kanato, that she ate the last cookie and let the problem solve itself. But no, we just got a brand new white carpet and that would be a waste.

I opened the door. Whipping it is. There was a bowl of some kind of weird mixture all over the floor... Walls...

*Drop*

And my nose tip. I took a glimpse at our ceiling while cleaning my nose. How was it even possible? Ceiling is more covered with that thing than floor. And finally I turned to face the one who created this mess.

Standing there, innocently smiling like an idiot she was. I rubbed my temple. Here comes the headache again. I walked closer to her. She was holding something. IT'S MY NICEST PLATE! If there was even a little scratch on it - she would regret having arms and legs to commit such crime.

"Reiji-san, I made you something!"  
Her cheerful voice filled the kitchen. The same voice I couldn't wait to hear screaming for mercy as I whip her to a bloody pulp.

"Will you take a bite?" She asked me with eyes sparkling as if she was a child waiting for her parents' approval. "Remember that time, when you said that lady should know how to cook? Well, it's not like I have a lot of experience with girly things, but I really wanted to give you something back for the food and tea you've been giving me."

She tasted her own cooking. There was no other reason why she would be spouting out nonsense like that. He definitely ate something she made. It was impossible for her to make something edible. IMPOSSIBLE! If it involved fire and microwave - beware for trouble, because she would make it double.

"It always gave me such a good night sleep." She walked towards me. "So please, tell me what you think." There was no way I was going to eat that thing, vampires might be immortal, but we still didn't know what kind of impact her cooking would have on my well-being   
I slowly took the plate from her hands. Delicate things and her was a really bad combination. I took a look around once more and sighed.

"I-I will clean everything so don't worry about that... Or that... *Drop* O-or t-that," she said while climbing the ladder. I must admit it - she became quite good at cleaning her own mess. I guess it's truth that practice is everything.

I looked down at that thing on my plate. What was that? I shook it a little bit. It didn't move as if it was glued to the plate. I turned my plate upside down. Indeed it was. What even was that? It looked like an infected moon that was about to die. That would probably happen if someone actually ate this thing. It didn't really matter if the poor victim was a vampire or demon himself... I think I will make her our chef the next time father visits. I guess I was staring at it for too long, because she was already done cleaning everything up. She was standing there nervously.

"S-so?" She asked. I snapped my eyes at her. If it wasn't glued to the plate, I would have thrown it at her stupid face.

"I wouldn't even give this to that good-for-nothing, much less eat this..." I waved my hand around the plate, "Mess myself. And what was it supposed to be?" I might have been strict, but I was also a curious man.

"A pancake," she whispered. If that thing on the plate was a pancake, then I was a pigeon.

"This deserves a punishment. Go to my room." She wasn't moving. "Now."  
"Okay, Reiji-san." I swear to Lucifer she smiled. I guess even being near this so called 'pancake' was dangerous to your sanity. It will be perfect with my tea. 

STEP TWO

"Sit down," Reiji gestured towards a fancy cushion chair. I gladly did so, because I was tired. Cooking, dodging an explosion, cleaning everything up was tiresome after all.

A sound of plate hitting the table got my attention. 

I looked down to see a plate with my pancake. Reiji then proceeded to pour some white tea. It was literally white. I didn't like the way it was smelling. I could already feel fear creeping up my spine.

"Now eat, later I will give you your real punishment... If you survive, that is," He smirked. For a first time in my life in here, I was more afraid of my own pancake than Reiji's obviously poisoned tea. So I figured out an easy solution - chit-chat until Laito decides to show his fedoraless head and ironically save me.

"So, Reiji- san, I can see you have a new brand of tea. What is it called? Drop-dead Earl White?" I asked while trying to pick up a cup for a sip, but he slapped my hand away.

"Not so fast. Eat up first," He ordered. I looked down at what I've created. I'll be honest with myself and all my dead relatives - I will meet them once again pretty soon. I tried to make this pancake edible, but I failed. My first mistake was choosing cinnamon instead of flour. One might ask 'How the fu..nny did this happen?!' I don't know. My second mistake, that I knew about, was using syrup instead of oil. How did I manage to do that? Miracles happen. Third mistake... Let's just say that I added some poisonous mushrooms by an accident. How do I know this? I checked it on the Internet later on. And some other things that I found in the kitchen.

I picked up my fork. I looked up at him with a begging expression that said 'Please, I'd do anything but this.' The bastard only smirked, folded his arms and leaned back on his seat.

Come on, Laito, come on. Dead person can't kill spiders. YOU NEED ME ALIVE, SO WHERE ARE YOU?!

My hand was shakily bringing my fork with a piece of pancake closer to my mouth, but then my prince with shining fur finally arrived.

STEP THREE

"Nfu~, I never knew you were suicidal, Bitch-chan~." Laito was in my room, he also had his back pressed against my door.

"Laito, it would be nice if you knocked next time," I let out a sigh of annoyance. "And it was getting interesting." I fixed my glasses with a middle finger. That was a little secret of mine - I do it on purpose.

"Huh? But that would be no fun~" Laito pouted. "Anyways, Reiji I have to talk to you about something little, so if you could please come out into the hallway and..."  
"No." I cut Laito off.  
"Nfu~ are you afraid that your little rat will escape?" I was not afraid of that, because my room had only one exit, I was worried that she would destroy something.  
"Okay, I'll go, but I'm not stepping out of my room." I walked towards the entrance of my room only to stop at the doorway.

Even though he was doing a pretty good job at hiding it, Laito was a little bit distressed. He also wasn't wearing that ridiculous thing on his head.

"So what is it that you wanted to talk about?" I asked, getting more and more irritated.  
"You see, the last girl I had at my place was so wild that she broke my bed. I need a new bed." I could feel my anger rising, but I tried to keep myself as calm and composed as possible.   
"Very well, I will make an order for a new thing right now." I was about to turn around and grab my phone, but he caught my hand forcing me to face him yet again.

"A-and I need something else, something, that only you can give me." I didn't like his expression. I really didn't.   
"And what would that be?" I asked with a raised eyebrow. Suddenly, I heard a clank. It was really faint, but I heard it. I was about to turn my head around to look at what was happening behind me, when...

"I'm trying to talk to you, damn it!" Laito shouted into my face with desperate eyes that ere getting watery, one hand was on my shoulder and the other one was under my chin, forcing me to look at him. That felt really weird.

"Laito, what kind of things do you think you are doing?"  
"Shut up," Laito ordered me. I had never seen him like that before. He was so serious, I could see his unreadable feelings pouring out of his eyes.   
"Do you know what kind of torture you've been giving me lately? I can't stop thinking about you, I've been having dreams about you that only you and me can make come true." I've never been THIS mortified in my entire vampire life.

'What kind of nonsense are you blabbering about,' is what I tried to ask, but he pressed his finger against my lips. "Shhhh, It's alright, you must be confused right now, but it's temporary, I promise." He. Winked. At. Me. I swear, I regretted not eating that pancake right now. I was in shock. Laito was a pervert, but I never thought that he would be into this kind of thing.

"Now," He took a look at my room and smiled.   
"Now, I need you to tell me one thing?" Oh god why am I here?  
"What do you think..." No no no....  
"About me acting in a romance drama?" ...What?

Laito took a few steps away from me. Thank you, Lucifer.  
"Judging from this expression of yours I can be sure that I will be chosen as the main love interest~." I have never been this relieved. This bastard was only acting.

"Do what you want, just get out of my sight!"  
"You're the boss here, nfufufufu~" And he was gone. I needed to rest for a little bit. I turned around just to see another annoying thing in my bedroom.

"Reiji-san, I'm feeling nauseous..." I walked closer to her, took a glimpse at her food. One piece of pancake was missing. And tea seemed to be touched. She drank some, even though it was a very small about, but I could tell that some was missing. I was too tired to deal with her dead body right now so I allowed her to leave.

STEP FOUR

"Get out," Reiji said in a worn out voice. I shakily stood up and wobbled out of the room while clutching my stomach. When the door behind me slammed shut, I let out a sigh of relief. That was a close one.

No, I did not eat that creation of devil. I hid a piece of pancake in my bra. And no, I did not drink that tea either. Finding a syringe was hard enough, especially seeing that little performance of Laito. I had no time to find the poison, so I simply got some of the tea into that syringe. Win win situation. Now, all I had to do was reach Laito's room. He was already waiting.


	3. Subaru's first bite

It was a nice summer night... Who am I trying to fool - it was like the night of Armageddon and the gates of hell has decided to open up in this mansion. It was so hot that you could fry some eggs on a pavement without forgetting to flip them over or they might burn into coil. And you might think that a big old house would be perfectly cool inside. YOU ARE WRONG.

I was in my room, dressed in swimming suit, tank top and short skirt. Why swimming suit, you might ask? One word, four letters - Shuu. All windows were opened. I was laying on the floor slowly traveling from one spot to the other searching for a colder part of the floor in a snowflake pose enjoying my new founded territory, when someone barged into my room.

"I'm so thirsty."  
"Honestly same."  
"Where are you, damn it?"  
"Down here."  
"The hell are you... Oh fuck it I'm too thirsty for your nonsense." Subaru then proceeded to lay down with me, or should I say, on me and reach out for my neck, but I stopped him.

"It's no wonder that you are so thirsty. I'm dressed like that, laying on the floor like that, it's only natural for you to feel this way after seeing me." Suddenly, is face was in front of mine, eyes were screaming 'DESTROY, MURDER, CRUSH THE WALL-CHAN!'

"I'm kidding, just kidding," I laughed nervously while sitting up.  
"You are thirsty because you are too hot. I mean look at yourself." I had a plan and I needed him to strip.  
"What does it have to do with m-my looks?" Was that a blush? Did he get shy?

"You are dressed way too much. At least remove this black jacket," I said while pulling it down his shoulders.

"THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" Now he was a standing blushing mess. "Helping you (me) to cool down. Now, take it off and you will see that this way you won't feel as hot as you are feeling now." Bullcrap, but hoped he would buy it.

"Tck, if you say so," he said while taking off his jacket.   
"Now come and drink my blood," I said in a lustful voice.   
"Don't tell me what to do. I'll drink it not because you said so, but because I'm thirsty." Yes, come closer my cold blooded Tsunbaru.

He was so close to me, I could already feel his cold breath on my neck.  
"Damn it you are hot," he whispered. I hugged him and pressed my body against his pale cold skin, enjoying it to the fullest. 

"Your skin feels so nice against mine, I want more," I whispered, already feeling the heat in my body being destroyed by Subaru. But I could swear that I heard a "Nfu~" somewhere, though I didn't care. As long as I had the least perverted Sakamaki as my cooling pad I didn't care about anything.

"I will ignore that," He hissed out while getting ready to sink his fangs my neck.  
"Good choice," I whispered. I closed my eyes waiting for the pain to come, but instead...

"Ouch!" I opened my eyes. He jumped up, one hand on his neck, frantically looking around.  
"What's wrong Subar..."

*BZZZZ*

Don't tell me... He was bitten by a mosquito. A vampire. Bitten. By. An. Fucking. MOSQUITO?! I didn't know the exact moment when I was, again, on the floor, laughing so hard that I had to cross my legs in order to keep everything inside.

"I WILL MURDER YOU, YOU SON OF A BITCH!"

"HAAAA?! WHAT DID ORE-SAMA DO TO YOU?!" Screamed voice from the kitchen.

I stopped rolling around, raised my head, took a quick glance at Subaru and after a moment I was back to hysterically laughing my ass off again.

He ignored me while trying to smash that mosquito. Poor thing decided to land on the wall.

*CRASH*

My wall. My poor little wall with new founded ventilation hole.   
"He he, short life, you little sucker," Subaru said it with such a prideful voice. He turned around to face me, when...

"THE HELL!" The very same hand was on the very same spot on the very same neck of a very same but hella pissed Subaru. When he removed his palm from it's now usual spot, I could see two bite marks. They looked just like vampire's bite. Oh god my belly won't handle this.

Subaru was running around my room, smashing my poor wall-chan, but mosquito proved to be a worthy enemy and dodged every single hit. Now Subaru did not let his guard down. He was like a wild animal. Eyes were fixed on his pray and sworn enemy - The Mosquito. And I was Subaru's great assistant - I kept the floor covered with my rolling body that was already in a near convulsive state because of the laughter.

*CRASH* *SMASH* *CRASH*

My walls looked like a sky full of stars... Huge fist size stars.

Subaru was panting, mosquito was flying and I was dying. But Subaru's eyes said that this fight was far from over. Mosquito was visibly tired. It was flying towards my room door. Subaru finally decided to use his head for thinking and not smashing. He had his fist prepared as he was slowly walking behind his soon to be victim. He patiently waited for his enemy to pick out a spot to land. Finally, mosquito was about a few millimeters away from his landing spot, but Subaru couldn't wait any longer. His fist was already flying with full power.

"Could you please explain why there's so much noise in your room, miss..."  
But Reiji was cut of... Or should I say knocked out by a flying fist towards his face.

*SMACK*

Poor Reiji was laying on the floor in the familiar snowflake pose, totally unconscious with the remains of a dead mosquito on his forehead.

Subaru just stood there, examining his fist. It had some Subaru's blood, indicating that the mosquito was dead. He had a creepy smirk on his face as if he was holding a napkin with Kaneki Ken's blood. But then he remembered that his fist collided with something softer that wood.

Once again, poor Reiji. His glasses were laying a few meters away from his head. One slipper still on his foot while the other was covering his slightly open mouth. Why was he still in his pajamas? Good question, but I don't know the answer.

Subaru looked at me, then I looked at him, then we both looked at Reiji.

\---

"What a pain.." Shuu muttered as he was walking, yes, walking towards my room.   
"Can't they be at least a little bit quieter in this heath.. Huh... Why is he here?" Shuu came closer to examine his fallen brother.   
"This looks interesting." He was about to leave, when he noticed something else.

"This is also interesting." He saw two bodies in a strange state. They were rolling all over the floor, clutching their bellies, mouths wide open as if they were trying to breathe or laugh, tears streaming down their faces. That sweet silent laugh, when you are laughing so hard you can't even breathe.

"I was expecting something like this from her, but not from you, Subaru."   
"O-OH SHU-SHUT U-UP!" Was all that Subaru could let out.

"Reiji will get mad at you because of this," Shuu reminded. I was wiping away tears.  
"Yeah, and why do you care?"   
"Your screams of agony not caused by me are equal to my loss of sleep. Now shut up, I want to sleep." He walked towards my bed. Usually, I'd be screaming bloody murder at him, but now he was like a huge package of ice to me. I won't have to suffer this heat while sleeping. But he was right.

"Hey, Rocky, what do we do about this one?"   
"Rocky?" He asked, while trying to stand up from the abs workout we just went through.   
"Forget it," I mumbled, "Reiji. What do we do with Reiji?"   
"I don't know."   
"Let's just carry him back into his room."   
"I guess I will have to do all the carrying?" Asked Subaru.   
"That's right, you were the one that took away his ability to walk, you will be the one to bring it back... In a way."

Subaru threw Reiji over his shoulder, I picked up Reiji's slippers and glasses. When we walked into his room, Subaru laid Reiji down into his bead. I cleaned his forehead, trying not to go into another fit of laughter. When everything was done, we went to the kitchen. I wanted some ice-cream and Subaru wanted something to drink.

I opened the freezer just to find nothing. No ice-cream no nothing. No. No no NO!!! THAT LITTLE PURPLE HAIRED TEDDY OBSESSED LOLI MANIAC! I won't forgive him. NEVER!!!


	4. First night here.

"Mom..." I said hesitantly. I have to... talk to you about something..."   
"I'm listening, sweetie," She answered without breaking an eye contact with an... Orchid.

"Did you notice how I wasn't interested in any guy at school?"   
"And thank goodness for that," My mom chirped out happily.  
"I won't have to be a young grandma."

"Well, I think I know the reason why..."  
"And why is that?" She still wasn't looking at me.  
"They only think about one thing. I mean - I tried dating one, but he wanted to do something that I realized I didn't want to do..." I was mumbling.

"Wait, are you talking about?.." Finally, she turned to face me.  
"Yes, mom, I figured out pretty fast that I can live without birds and bees AND NO! I didn't have to lick some honey to find out about that." Okay, I just said that I have NO interest in 'adult activities'.

"So I will never be a grandmother," She whispered and sat down - one hand on her forehead.   
"Uhm, mom, I'm not the only child, you know."  
"GOD DAMN IT! AT YOUR LEFT AT YOUR LEFT! SHOOT HIM! AAAND we're dead!" You could hear my brother screaming out in frustration because he was losing in a video game.  
"Never will I hold my grandchild."

"Mom, that's not all..."  
"What else are you going to tell me? That you have a girlfriend or something?!"

"Hehe, you are so good at guessing things, and yet you still haven't won anything in lotteries," I laughed nervously. Her eyes widened.   
"Wait, you do?!" I had to hold in an urge to sing 'Bitch, you guessed it-HOO! You was right' but that would make my situation even worse.

"Oh dear God, my daughter is going straight to hell."   
"I might be going to hell, but not straight." 

"FAMILY MEETING RIGHT NOW!"

§Living room§

I was sitting on the couch trying not to show emotions or any kind of feelings. My parents couldn't sit in one place - they were walking back and forth. My brother was playing 'Summoners war' and didn't give the slightest to what was happening.

"My daughter is a freak."  
"Hey, watching 'Free!' only for the plot doesn't make me a freak." I folded my hands with a pout. Honesty, I can't deny it - those guys were good looking, especially in both endings. My favourite is the one dressed as a cop. But I prefer them with clothes.

"What's her name?"  
"Elara."  
"How long have you been... Dating?"  
"6 months anniversary is today."  
"Oh for... Did you do anything unforgivable?"  
"As I've been telling you - no. We only hugged, didn't even kiss."  
"Okay, we still can save you."  
"Save me from what?"  
"This." Dad pointed at the ground.  
"Save me from being grounded?" I asked innocently.   
"SAVE YOU FROM HELL!"  
"I won't have to go to school?" I asked happily. My brother high fived me.

"Darling, she's not taking us seriously," Mom stated a solid fact.  
"We have to do something and fast. Come to think of it - my boss was talking on the phone with someone about how he was in a need of bride for his sons. Maybe living with boys will save her." My dad took out his phone. I was starting to feel uneasy. He dialed someone's number. My legs were getting numb.

"Ah hello, Mister Sakamaki, yes it's me. I'm sorry for calling you at the weekend, but I have an important issue to talk to you about..."

...... ........ ........ ........

 

And here I was, in a car. My stuff packed in luggages. So, my parents thought that making me live with six guys will 'fix' my head. They said that even getting pregnant at my age was better than dating a girl... The best part is - I'm ace. I just didn't have a chance to properly explain that. Oh well...

My relationship with Elara was something straight out of a shoujo manga - even hugs are a big deal for me. But she said that she was fine with that. She was not pushy like that guy was. She understood me. I knew my parents would react this way. I also knew I would go through anything with her support. So I asked her if she didn't mind coming over to the Sakamaki mansion to help me unpack my stuff. It was only 30 minutes away from her house, so she happily agreed to.

And here it was - the Sakamaki mansion. Damn this house was huge. Car stopped near the gates. I took my stuff and started walking. Call me crazy, but it felt like I was in some sort of weird vampire anime. And this feeling I couldn't shake off... As if they already knew that I was here... They probably did, because, you know - cars make noise. But still, I couldn't help myself but have this feeling - as if someone was watching every single step I was taking. It felt like I was just a little lamb walking further and further into the woods with no way out. A lamb that was already noticed by the predators. I hope that Elara was on her way here.

I reached the doors. I knocked. Silence. I knocked again. Nothing. If this was a horror movie - I should be getting the hell out of here, but I couldn't - I had nowhere to go. Maybe I'll wait until someone decides to go shopping or something. I was about to knock again, when everything went black.

A hand was covering my eyes. I yelped in surprise.   
"Guess who~" A smooth whisper reached my right ear. For a moment I was terrified, but only for a moment.

"Elara, what the hell!? You scared me to death," I said while holding a hand against my heart.  
"Sorry, sorry - I just couldn't stop myself. You appeared to be a bit scared, so I decided to loosen you up." She simply loved my terrified face. When I get scared - my heart starts beating faster, from time to time my cheeks get a deep blush because of the adrenalin, my breathing becomes shakily and unsteady as if I was running or working out, sometimes my legs turn into jelly and I have to hold on to the wall or I would fall. I honestly didn't know why she liked doing that, but she said that this appearance reminded her something.

"Why are you still outside?"   
"No one showed up."  
"Why won't you just walk in?"  
"Trespassing."  
"But you are going to live here anyway."   
"Yes, I am, but it doesn't mean that I'm already living here. I don't want to go to jail or something and lose you. Right now you are the only person in my life who's still here for me," I whispered the last part, but she heard it. She was about to say something, when an angry young man opened the doors.

"Uhm, hi!" I said nervously, "My name is..."  
"I was already informed who you are, no need for this useless babbling."   
"Oh then that saves me the trouble," I laughed nervously. He turned around and walked back inside. I took this as a sign to come in and follow him. I took my luggage and walk inside, Elara was right behind me.

This place seemed to be even bigger on the inside. I looked around with my mouth wide open.   
"Wow..." We both said in awe. Guy with glasses coughed out to catch our attention.   
"This way, please. We have to introduce ourselves properly."   
"Yeah, sure." I was about to take my luggage and start walking, when butler came outta nowhere and took my stuff. I think I'll call him Randy.

So, when Randy took away my stuff, he disappeared. Just like that. I was about to question my sanity, when Elara pushed me to the direction of the living room.

When we entered the room, I saw six kinda weird looking guys. I've already seen one, but still. Yes, they all were unnaturally good looking - straight outta reverse harem anime I'd say, but it didn't mean that they weren't weird. I mean - their hair colour. It was quite obvious that it wasn't dyed. Good thing no one had blue or green hair, because my Instagram would be filed with their braided hairstyles with real flower crowns. I could already imagine how I put daisy crown on the childish looking guy with a teddy bear in his arms. And maybe a dandelion crown for the badass looking one with white but pinkish hair. I bet he would be a blushing mess. Oh right, the introduction.

"Uhm, hello, my name is..."  
"Nfu~ We already know who you are, Bitch-chan." I was kinda annoyed by the new nickname I was given so suddenly, but I decided to let it slide just for now.

"WHAT THE HELL?!" *SMASH* "We were told that only one human will come! Why is she here?" Okay, so the white badass needs a Snicker or two.   
"Answer me!" Three Snickers would be perfect.  
"She's Elara and she is..."

"Let me take a wild guess," Said the red haired one, without a weird hat.  
"She's your friend."   
"N-no, she is..."  
"Oh, she's your younger sister, ne~ I can think of some interesting activities for all three of us." Okay - this guy with fedora is officially cringey. Disgust in my face was quite obvious.  
"Hell no, and she is not my younger sister!"  
"So she's the older one."  
"She's not my sister." I was angry at this point. Couldn't these guys just wait until I finished talking?  
"Hehe, don't tell me that she's actually OUR sister." I was so done with this.

"Oh, I'm sorry for my rudeness, my name is Elara and I'm her girlfriend. Don't worry - I won't stay here for a long time, I only came here to help her with unpacking," she said calmly.  
"Well that's a new one."  
"Nfu~ a girlfriend, you say..."

"Ayato, Laito, stop this nonsense right now. You'll have plenty of time to harass her later on, now let's cover up things that are important. My name is Reiji Sakama..."  
"ORE-SAMA IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOU! I'm Ayato, but you must call me Ore-sama," he said with a smirk.   
"I-I think that you are doing pretty good job yourself, Ayato, so I kindly refuse to."   
"What did you just say?" Is it me, or did his eyes just become red? I turned to Elara for confirmation, but she wasn't looking at me or Ayato.

"Shut up, you are ruining my music," Groaned blond guy. He was laying on a sofa, dressed in a comfy sweater, listening to some music. I just found my spirit animal.

"Anyways, this good-for-nothing couch potato is the eldest son - Shuu. I'm the second eldest - Reiji. This is Ayato, Kanato, Laito and they are triplets. And this over there is the youngest - Subaru." Was I the only one who thought about Monsta X 'Rush'? Vroom vroom? No? Okay.

"Now, do you have any kind of question?" Did I miss something? Did he say something more? Oh, whatever.  
"Actually, I do have a few: number one - where is my room? Number two - where is the kitchen and am I allowed to use it? And the most important one - what is your wifi password?"

"I will show you around the mansion. You are allowed to use the kitchen and what is wifi?" I literally fell down on my knees. They... They didn't have... Wifi? My whole life was on the Internet. How was I going to access my actual life now? But then Ayato started laughing hysterically.

"You... You... actually... fell... for it!" He was laughing so hard that now there were two people in a doggy pose on the floor - Ayato and I. The only difference was that I was shaking in terror and he was laughing.

"Ayato, I must admit that this is the only joke I enjoy." Reiji fixed his glasses. Damn bastard. I'm so not believing them anymore. They can say they are a bunch of freaking vampires and I would laugh into their stupid faces.

"Reiji-san, can we please go to my room? Elara has to go home by the sunrise."  
"Very well, follow me." I turned around to tell Elara that we have to go, but she was not in the room. Where was she? Maybe she asked Randy to take her to my room. With this in my head, I followed Reiji. This mansion was huge. I think that I might need a map or GPS until I memorize my way to the kitchen. My room was impressive and by impressive I mean PINK. WAS. EVERYWHERE. It almost made me sick. But that was not the main problem. The real question appeared - where was Elara.

"Reiji-san, may I ask you something?"   
"No."  
"Okay."

I finished unpacking my stuff. Alone. It took me a few hours, but I managed it somehow. After that, I decided to call her, but she didn't pick up the phone. I was getting worried. I called her again - maybe I will hear her phone ringing. I started aimlessly walking through the hallways searching for some clues. Nothing. I called her again and again. I didn't notice when I was at the dead-end of the hallway. There was a closet. Why? Maybe another shortcut to Narnia. I ignored it because I really didn't want to deal with some random angry ice queen with menopause. Lady thinks that covering an entire world with snow would help her with her hot flashes. Tsk tsk.

There also was wooden door. But because door in a house was not a weird or rare thing to find, I was about to turn around and leave, when I heard it. Voices. One voice was silky-smooth and so sweet that I could literally feel my dinner coming out. Another voice sounded feminine. Elara was in there.  
"Do you really love me?"  
"Nfu~ Of course I do, why else would I do this kind of things to you. Now tell me what you've been screaming a little bit earlier." What was going on?  
"I-I..."  
"You what?"  
"I love you."

This hit me hard. Really hard. It felt as if someone has ripped my heart out of my chest and used it as a ball for 2014 FIFA World Cup Germany vs Brazil.... Me being Brazil...

It felt like I was a small child watching her mom put presents under a Christmas tree without even taking a single bite from the cookies I've worked so hard on...

It felt like my heart was on the second day of its period with no painkillers or hot water bottles or chocolate.

I was feeling like physics laws in anime - useless.

To summarize it all - I felt betrayal, pain, devastation, shame and a lot more, but I didn't know how to name these emotions. I should be doing something. I should be crying, confronting her, but I just stood there behind the closed door.

 

"So cute~ But don't you love your girlfriend?" I think I shouldn't be listening to this anymore but I just couldn't move.  
"I love her, but, you know, this girl right here has her needs." Of course. Why didn't I understand this earlier. She wasn't happy, she was suffering with me and sacrificing her needs for me. Maybe that was for the best. She would be free, my parents would be happy that I was dating no one, my brother would continue on playing games... Okay, things won't change for him (that lucky bastard) and I would spend my days locked inside my pink jail trying to hide away from these guys.

I was about to turn around and leave when...  
"How are you feeling after hearing this, hmm~?" Suddenly door was ripped wide open. The first thing I noticed was Elara laying on his bed covered with a blanket. Her facial expression was pure shock.   
"I-it's not what it looks like."   
"Oh thank god, because I thought that you were playing twister in his bed..." I took a look at her bra on the floor near my foot, "... naked."  
"He said he loves me..." Her voice was a whisper.

I turn to face half naked Laito, who was, fortunately, wearing pants.  
"What's her name?"  
"Nfu~ names are not important when we are talking about love." He. Winked. At. Me. Cringey.

"He doesn't even know your name... But I do understand you - I'm not good enough to be in a relationship. I won't make you suffer anymore. Thank you for coming here to help me, but I..." I didn't know what to say. A ball was starting to burn my throat.  
"Just continue on what you were doing." I said this and left the room.

I don't know how I found my room with no map or GPS, but I was emotionally and physically exhausted. I couldn't wait to fall asleep and forget about everything for a while. I didn't cry, I didn't scream, I just wanted some sort of distraction to forget about everything that happened. Sleep might be a good choice. I walked into my room and realized - there was some distraction in my room. My bed was already occupied. Take away my home, my wifi, even my cheating ex-girlfriend, but don't touch my bed. This. Means. War.


	5. Sleeping Beauty and the sleep deprived Beast

I was upset, heartbroken and tired. My first day in this cursed house was a nightmare. I lost everything dear to me. All I had left was my bed and my privacy. And as far as I could see - I will also lose those two... Really fast. Like, right now.

The moment I walked into my room I saw something on my bed. Golden hair was shining under the moonlight. Was that a golden retriever? I wish. Maybe it was Garfield? I didn't smell lasagna so the answer was negative.

"Grandmother! Why are you wearing baggy clothes?" Silence  
"Grandmother! How come you are listening to music while sleeping?" No response.  
"Grandmother, why aren't you responding to any of my questions? Wolf got your tongue? Still asleep, huh."

"Sleeping Beauty, wake up! Oh, so you want a kiss, huh..?" He didn't move, but I had a feeling that he was only acting. I remember faking that I'm asleep just to make my father really angry and be late for whatever he had to attend to. Babysitting me is a hard task. Yes. IS.

"Well, this is an emergency, because I really want to sleep, so..." I walked to my closet and took out my small stuffed dog/pillow toy.  
"Sleepy head, meet your prince charming. Prince charming, this is your Sleeping Beauty. Now, when introduction is over..." I pressed my dog's face against Shuu's lips. Did his eyebrow just twitch right now? He was definitely awake, that bastard. But why wouldn't he do anything.

"So, you want a real one, but how do I find a real prince. I heard you guys were aristocrats. High class and stuff like that... I'M A GENIUS!" I screamed out joyfully. I opened my bedroom door, took a deep breath and let my voice box do it's job:

"I NEED A PRINCE THAT WOULD KISS SLEEPING BEAUTY!!! IS ANYONE DOWN FOR THAT?" No answer.

"I NEED A PERVERT IN MY ROOM! THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!"

"Nfu~ Are you already feeling this lonely, Bitch-chan?" Why didn't this surprise me. His hair was a mess and so were his clothes. Thank goodness he had a shirt on this time. But he came to my room quite fast... A little bit too fast actually. Oh well - lucky me.

"If I told you that this one here on my bed is my girlfriend, would you kiss him?" It worked just a few hours ago, so why wouldn't it work now? And I had a feeling that Laito would kiss anyone. Shuu's face tensed up slightly. I chuckled. Two can play this 'personal space invading ' game.

"Huh?" Laito was dumbfounded.

"I need him to wake up and I'm not a prince charming, am I? My dog didn't work and I really want to just sleep peacefully. I'm tired, emotionally and physically exhausted, because of YOU know who, so will you do it or..." I turn around to face him, but he was gone, "...not."

I turn around to inspect Shuu's face. Now it was obvious that he was wide awake. He was sweating, face showed relief and worry at the same time. Why won't he just leave already.

"Listen here, I'm tired of this game. Leave my room."   
"Shut up, you're ruining my music."   
"If I'm ruining your music, why won't you listen to it, I don't know, IN YOUR OWN GOD DAMN ROOM?!" I was starting to get angry. I hate when someone invades my territory without my permission.

"Just shut up and come here - your bed is big enough for both of us." He opened one eye and smirked.  
"Oh my, what a lewd woman you are. Just a thought of being in a same bed with me made you blush so furiously."

Ice bucked challenge that is. But he was right in a way - I was furious. Absolutely livid would be a better definition. And that was not a blush on my cheeks, that was a colour of flames from hell that rose from the darkest parts of my heart that no one should touch or see. When I get red angry, I do something stupid.

I walked into my bathroom, turned on the tap and pushed the handle all the way to the freezing cold water and left it like this, so that really cold water would appear. Without waisting my time, I found a bucked that was there for cleaning. I filled it up with ice cold water and walked back.

With no hesitation, I poured it directly on Shuu. He just sighed and continued on doing nothing. Was this psychopath going to ignore freezing water and just continue on sleeping?!

Bucked slipped out and fell on the ground. He had in-ear headphones on. How was his mp3 still alright? Oh yeah, they were rich - waterproof stuff. But wasn't it uncomfortable to sleep when you are drenched like that? How could a person be this lazy? Did this guy sleep everywhere? Even in water?

So my spirit animal in reality was a demon that started haunting my bed.

Time for plan B. I picked up his leg by the ankle and started pulling him out of my bed. He grunted in annoyance. Normally, even with such size and weight difference I would be able to remove him (experience with my brother) but now, wet blanket and drenched clothes created too much friction. He wasn't moving no mater how hard I was trying. I gave up on pulling him out and started pushing him instead. IT WAS WORKING! He was moving! His body was actually rolling closer and closer to the edge of the bed. One push, one more and he would be on the floor. I could already imagine that sound of his body hitting the wood.

*THUD*

Why was I the one in pain? I opened my eyes. Why was I looking at my pink ceiling? And why was I laying on the floor? I groaned as I tried to sit up. My head hurt and so did my back. What happened? I remember trying to push Shuu out of my bead. I could already taste the victory, when...

"So you're awake. And I was hoping to enjoy this peaceful moment for a bit longer."  
"What happened?" I asked while trying to stand up, but my head was a little bit dizzy and my back still hurt.

"Don't you remember? I'm too tired to switch places with the thing that is supposed to be in your head but isn't and explain you everything that happened." Rude.

Yet again, I tried to stand up but in vain. Oh no, mister Sakamaki, I'm totally fine. No need to worry about me or help me. I can definitely handle this myself. I'll just cosplay Yoon Bum and crawl to the bathroom where I have painkillers. No no, keep on sleeping. I insist.

"Damn little brat," I muttered while crawling towards the bathroom in now too familiar dog pose - on all four.   
I swear to god, if I have to repeat this pose again today - I will make their lifes into a living hell - I will cook for them EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

I started giggling like an evil school girl, imagining how they get food poisoning and start running towards the bathroom as if their life depended on that white throne. And the most wicked thing to do in this situation you might ask? Yes. OIL IN FRONT OF ALL BATHROOM DOORS! Oh god I could already hear their screams of terror and pure shame.

At this point of my fantasy I started laughing like a maniac.  
Just imagine a hyena that was hit by a car and you get me. Finally, I reached bathroom door. I tried to grab the handle, but I couldn't - my damn back hurt too much.

"I should borrow that leash from Laito." Shuu chuckled.

"You own a dog?! Oh my god I want to pet it. Where is it? Where can I find it?" My eyes were sparkling.  
"We don't have a dog."  
"Then why would Laito need it..? Ohhhhh...".

"What a weird guy he must be," I Mumbled, "Using leash on a poor cat..."  
"You finally figured that ou... Wait, what?" Shuu was confused.  
"If it's not for a dog, then it's for a cat. Poor kitty cat." I slammed my fist against the floor. Owie - head, back and now my hand. Perfection.  
"I think I'll teach you about that someday." Shuu smirked.  
"I have a feeling that I won't like it."

Yes! I managed to open my bathroom door. Using the sink, I pulled myself up. I filled a glass with water - it was ice-cold. And now, last but not least - I will take this advil pill AND DRINK IT. And I did just that.

It would take some time for an effect to kick in so I took a glimpse at the mirror and screamed. WHO LET THIS GRUDGE SPIRRIN IN!? Oh wait no - that was me. God I looked awful. Bags under my eyes, messy, kinda wet hair. Was that a bruise on my cheek? Bloodshot eyes. I needed a dose of beauty sleep and fast.

I could feel pain from my back fading away. At least I could walk like a normal granny right now.

Shuu was still on my bead. So I guess it was time for plan C - couch.

I reached my closet, took out a spare blanket and a spare pillow. I picked up my stuffed dog and left my bedroom. Living room had a pretty decent couch, I guess I'll sleep there for tonight, I mean, what can go wrong, right? (Oh, you silly human, you can't even imagine it yet Ψ(｀▽')Ψ)

§Living room§

Ah, the blue couch - my new favourite. I lied down, snuggled into the blanket and hugged my dog. This was heaven. I didn't even notice when I was in a dream world.

......... ............... ............... ...........

Ayato was running away from Kanato with Mister Teddy in his hands.   
"Where do I hide it... Oh and what do we have here?" He saw a girl sleeping on a couch, tightly hugging her plush toy.   
"This is just too good to be real." He flashed the most evil grin planet Earth has ever witnessed.

Ayato was now hiding somewhere in the room, holding a weird looking dog, snickering quietly.  
"Show time."  
........................................................................

I hope you liked this chapter!

Next chapter is (you guessed it!): 'They are WHAT!?'


	6. They are WHAT?!

Kanato ran into the living room frantically looking around for his brother and Teddy. Ayato was here just a moment ago. Teddy must be here. He then saw sleeping human girl.

"WHERE IS IT?!" She was not responding.  
"WAKE UP YOU HUMAN TRASH!" He ripped the blanket off and stood there in shock.

"How dare you... To do this to my... TEDDY?!"

.......... .........

What's that noise? I just fell asleep and someone was already screaming bloody murder. Must be a dream. I'll just ignore that and... WHHAA-

*SLAM*

I thought that my back already hurt like hell after the wrestling match with Shuu, but after this contact with the wall I doubt that I will ever be able to walk again. I felt someone's cold hand digging into my throat. I knew that chokers were really popular these days but come on! He was going to crush my neck like a KitKat bar. I opened my eyes - it was that guy with a teddy bear. That's it, young man, no daisy crowns for you.

"HOW DARE YOU TO TOUCH MY TEDDY IN SUCH AN INDECENT WAY?! ANSWER ME!" What Teddy? The hell was he talking about? I was just sleeping with my dog and... Oh no... I managed to look down at my plush toy and... OH HELL NAHH! Why was I holding this creepy doll?!

I tried to give that bear back to him but he ignored that. My hands were shaking. Right now, this thing was like heaviest object in an entire universe. My unfortunate soul dropped it on the floor but Kanato didn't seem to notice.

"ANSWER ME!" I couldn't even breathe and he just kept on squeezing the life out of me harder and harder. How was I supposed to answer something if I'm about to die?

"Kanato, that's enough." Reiji-san! I'm so happy to see you! If I wasn't being killed right now, I might even hug you out of happiness or give you a nod of gratitude... If my head would be on its original position after all this mess.

"YOU DARE TO ORDER ME AROUND?!" I could already see that this purple haired kiddo needed a hug or two... Who's gonna be a volunteer because I'm not doing that - I kinda still value this pathetic and boring life of mine.

But thankfully, he released me and I fell on the floor. And here I was - third time sitting like a dog, coughing and trying not to pass out.

"It's not me. Father ordered us not to kill her. Remember, if she dies - you lose your doll collection." That's right, Reiji, you tell him! No killing me or you'll... Wait what.

"What... do you mean by... ordered not to kill me?"  
"You don't know? You are our sacrificial bride."  
"What do you mean?" I was trying to stand up, leaning on a wall for support but my back hurt like hell and it was really painful to breathe.

"You are Ore-sama's food, that's what." I squealed in surprise. He was right in front of me. Out of thin air! One moment I'm staring at Reiji and the other - Ayato had me pinned against the wall, grinning from ear to ear, his fangs sparkling like two diamonds.

"V-v-vampire?"  
"Finally, you figured that out." He was slowly leaning towards me, but I started to laugh hysterically. He stopped with his mouth agape.

"Do you really think that these fake sparklers in your mouth will make me believe that vampires exist? Actual vampires? Don't be ridiculous."  
"Nfu~ So Bitch-chan thinks that we are a bunch of liars. Ayato-kun, shall we show her how real our fangs are?"  
This lustful gaze gave me flies in my stomach. Big disgusting flies.

"No need no need! I believe it! Your eyes became red when we met - I believe it! You are a vampire family and I'm a dead dry meat soon to be - there's no need for a visual explanation to understand that." I'll just play along. If they think that it was that easy to fool me twice - they'll have to think again. But I was still trapped between the wall and now two red haired brothers and I didn't like the look they were giving me.

"How many times do I have to tell you to do these kind of activities in your own room." Reiji gracefully flipped us off by fixing his glasses. They were doing what here? I really didn't need to know any more details.

"We just want to taste her. It will be quick~" Laito's eyes became red and his fangs grew longer. Okay, if this was a horror movie - I was dead meat. If this was a dream - I'll wake up screaming the moment he bites me, if this was Twilight - I'm supposed to confess my love to him as he vows to never hurt me in any way possible, then we get married, spend a sweet sweet honeymoon together, I get pregnant aaaand yeah no. I choose a nightmare, thank you.

"Dad, mom, look - what a great place you chose me to live in. And your plan was a pure success. There are already two guys head over heels for me. Ohhh mom, but just look at me, thinking about how the hell am I going to escape from a bunch of vampires with a poor taste of fashion."

"Haaaa? You say what?" I look Ayato straight in his eyes.  
"Oh, I'm sorry, Subaru has a pretty decent taste and so does Reiji."

"Are you telling me that this tableware otaku is better than me?" His voice was calm, but his eyes were infuriated. I guess I pressed the wrong button with this one.

"No, I was saying that AGH..." HE BIT MY NECK! It hurt so bad I thought that I was going to pass out out of pain. So he really was a vampire. The stronger this pain was getting the harder realization hit me like a hammer. And it was not a dream. Slowly but surely my consciousness was slipping away. The last seconds before blackness consumed my mind were spent on thinking about how I've lost everything - my home and family for Elara, Elara because of my body and now my body because of who knows why. I've lost everything I was trying to protect or save. I failed again and now there was no escape...

 

...or was there?

Right now I was running down the hallway, wearing my running shoes, light backpack and black jumper. I was going to get away from this vampire nest in one way or another - preferably alive of course.

It was hard to believe that they were vampires, but Ayato did a great job at convincing me. When I woke up - I was in my now Shuuless bed. It was dry and I wasn't shivering so I guess someone fixed that one for me. And the most amazing thing I saw outside, you might ask? It was daytime. Time for The Sakamaki Redemption.

I was trying to be as quiet as possible in the hallway. And here it was - the exit. I opened the big wooden doors and stepped outside. Ah, the beautiful sun, but there was no time for pleasure - I started sprinting towards the gates. Unlocked. Maybe today luck was on my side. Maybe today I will be able to at least save my life. Maybe, just maybe, I won't fail.

The moment I closed the gates, I started runing in full speed. It was the best feeling in my life. With every step taken I felt like I was regaining my life, like I was getting it back... Sadly, after five steps - I stepped on my shoelace. I fell on the ground twisting my ankle...  
"Motherfu€ker..." I cursed and I shit you not, I heard a 'Nfu~' somewhere in the wind.

And here I was again - on my knees like a bad little puppy I was. I tried to stand up, but my leg hurt too damn much. Even I knew that it was impossible to cross the forest in this condition, so I just lowered my head, turned around and crawled my way back to the mansion.

"There's no place like home..." I said while opening the fridge. Something that is cold and in a bag... Frozen beans will do. Walking was still out of question and my knees were already bruised so I was jumping my way towards my room on one leg.

And here it was - my very own Mountain Everest - the staircase. Should I jump my way up or should I crawl? I'll crawl. I was in a middle of finishing the damn thing, but dear sweet Luck kicked me in a face... AGAIN. My hand slipped and I fell down to the very bottom - just like my dignity.

The previous back injury came back to say a cheerful 'Hi!', my leg hurt even more and my will to live was just like that bag of frozen beans - ripped into the pieces and spilled everywhere.

"No more... I give up..."  
"One bite and you're already a mess, pitiful. To be honest, you were the first one to fail your runaway attempt so badly." Reiji's voice.  
"It was so amusing to watch how you fell and crawled back," Ayato laughed.  
"You were watching?"  
"Indeed we were. Did you really think it would be this easy to escape from us?" Shut it, Reiji.  
"Why didn't you stop me from the very beginning?"  
"Hunting would have started once you broke loose, but good Bitch-chan crawled back into our loving hands." Yeah right. In this kind of situation I just wanted to do one thing - just lay here and...

"Now, it's time for the punishment... Is she asleep?"

"Seems to be the case."

"Who's gonna bring her to her room this time?"

"HEY! *SMASH* Don't you look at me!"

"Nfu~ With pleasure~."

"Okay, fine - I'll do it. Another screaming girl would be too damn annoying: 'Who changed my clothes?!' It's obvious who. Tck, damn pervert."

"Rude. Last time Shuu did that - not me."

"I wouldn't do something as amateur as this, now shut up and let me enjoy my 'music'."

"Amateur? Who do you call amateur?"

"How unsightly, isn't it right, Teddy?"

"Everyone, cease this nonsense and go back to sleep."

"Killjoy."

And this is how my life started in the Sakamaki mansion. Basically, I was beaten up by these girls, named Fortune and Luck. Then came a boy, named Reiji and his little helper - the whip. Boy was that a 'fun' first night and the day after with my new family.  
But hey - you gain some, you lose some. Once I was back to my as normal as possible life with six vampires in my neck, I started having some 'fun' with them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this story! I really appreciate it!


	7. Miserable me

"The biggest one was actually on 1948 May 22. At 4 a.m. people were woken up and ordered to leave their houses and valuable stuff behind. They were stuffed in the trains like animals and brought to the worst possible living conditions for death. All of this mess had started a bit before the nazis were killing the jews and people that were helping them and then continued later on after the war. So in conclusion, this poor little country had to survive a double elimination from two different sides." I finished talking, trying to focus on the history lesson about World War II and what happened after that, but I could feel my head getting heaver and it was getting harder and more painful to talk. I didn't want to get sick now - I had a history test tomorrow that I couldn't skip.

It's alright - I just have to go through the rest of the history lesson and I'll be free to be a sick burrito with Netflix as my company for the rest of the day. But right now, I was trembling in my seat, begging for someone to set the school on fire so I could feel a bit warmer. Where's Kanato when you need him the most?

"Nfu~ Your cheeks are all red. Are you thinking about me right now? How you want to strip me down and..."  
"Shut the hell up, you brainless two headed idio... Actually, yes, I am." His comfy fur jacket seemed to be really appealing right now.

"Do you need clothes to contain your body heat?"  
"Vampires require no such thing, Bitch-chan~." My evil grin showed up in my head.   
"Laito, can you give me your jacket then?" I made these puppy eyes, trying to make his cold blooded heart melt a little bit.

"And what is it for me, huh? Why should I give it to you?"  
"Even I know that sick blood tastes awful. I need that jacket." I whispered.

"Could you please take your date outside the classroom, we are talking about serious things here." My teacher made that old joke again.  
"I-I'm sorry, miss, but I'm really cold and I was hoping that Laito would lend me his warm and fluffy jacket. The way he would take it off and throw it at my face, revealing everything that has been hiding underneath the thick layer of the clothing. Wouldn't it make everyone just a little bit warmer, hmm?" Our teacher was young and I once walked in on them 'flirting' with each other (god, why always me?), so I knew which button to press.

Poor female did pick up the stench of blackmail in my words. Smart woman... Okay fine - not a complete idiot, considering the scandalous relationship she had with her own student... Who's basically a few centuries older than she was, but still - no one else knew about this.

"Mister Laito, you don't want your classmate to get sick, do you?"  
"Nfu~ it's my pleasure to help." Under the most unfortunate circumstances, I had to sit with him, so he was always too close for my liking, but not today. I got my jacket. Yes. Now it's mine. Deal with it.

He actually didn't throw it, but gently put it over my shoulders. Some girls were awwwwing, some girls (including my teacher) were killing me with their eyes and cursing my existence and Laito just had his usual 'You will pay with your body' expression. Guess when I'm all healthy I'll get a sudden anemia.

"Thanks," I whispered while snuggling into the fur. His jacked smelled pretty nice - a mixture of Laito's cologne and different kind of female perfume.

I though that this would help, but I was so wrong. I was still a shacking mess. In the limo Ayato screamed out his question:  
"WHY THE HELL ARE YOU WEARING HIS JACKET AND NOT ORE-SAMA'S!? YOU ARE MINE - NOT HIS!"

"Because I had history with Laito and chemistry with you was already over *sniff* earlier this morning. And his fur is warmer than your... Ribbon, so..." God my head was pounding. And now my nose hurt and it was hard to breathe. I just wanted to lie down and take a nap. I don't usually take naps, but this time I would forgive myself.

I walked through the hallway towards my room, moaning and complaining about my condition. No one was listening to me though. I opened my room door and felt déjà vu creeping up my spine and banging my head with a hammer.

Shuu was in my bead 'sleeping'. The healthy me would have tried to solve this 'little' problem, but current me had -10 shi...itake mushrooms to give. Carefully, not to trip over myself, I crawled into my bed with an unwanted guest, I turned my back to him and tried to fall asleep. It was a hard task, because my head was starting to hurt really bad. I squeezed my eyes shut and tossed around a little bit. Usually, I would hug my plush dog and get over the pain, but bastard Kanato burned it to ashes. Ah, finally... A comfortable position enough for sleep.

"Lewd woman indeed." Oh no. No no no no NO! Don't tell me... Am I...   
"Huh? First she crawls into the bed with me, then she starts holding onto me like there's no tomorrow and now she's dead asleep. Weird woman indeed... Wait... She's blushing and she feels hotter that usual and yet she's still shivering. That means..."

 

Flashback

"Our rule number one will all brides that are not supposed to die - the one that makes her weak/sick/passed out or finds her that way - has to take care of her. Do you have any objection?"   
"No."   
"Good."

 

End of the flashback

I stared at the sleeping, obviously sick girl for a while, not knowing what to do to get out of this situation. I didn't have time for this. If I left now unnoticed, I wouldn't have to...

"Nfu~ I came here for my jacket and she's already with someone else." I didn't know how to feel about this situation. Should I be happy or feel like I was doomed.

"You can have her - I'm not in the mood tonight." I tried to leave her in Laito's care and leave the room, but Laito was not stupid like seemed to be.

"You won't throw your responsibilities on me." Damn smart-ass.   
"She can have this jacket for now. I will take it off myself later, nfu~" And he was gone. Maybe Ayato will show up. No, Ayato had basketball today he won't be back. She's coughing in her sleep. Her condition is getting worse and worse every minute. I guess I have no other choice then.

............. ............. ............ ............ 

"Human, why are you in my bed?" Huh?   
"I-it's *cough* my bed *cough* *cough* oh god my head..." This voice sounded like Reiji. But I swear I fell asleep in my own room with Shuu, so how did I...

"I advice you to open your eyes before talking nonsense like that." I tried to do just that.  
"Reiji, you are blurry. Are you alright? Did the animators screw up again?"  
"It's worse than I thought - you're already delirious but that doesn't answer my question. Why are you here?"

"Ask *sounds of suffocation* Shuu... Oh god why me..." Reiji walked closer to me. Under normal circumstances I would be trying to get the hell away from this creep, but now I was too weak and his bed was just too comfortable to ignore.

"Don't tell me he left you here and ran off to some place."

§Somewhere in the woods§

"Perfect. Peace and quiet. Now I can enjoy my music to the fullest."

§Back to Reiji's room§

"Curse that dead-beat." I could see rage in Reiji's eyes. Reiji... Rage... Hehe... Sounds similar.

"I don't... want to be a *cough* burden, so... I'll just go, drink some tea and *wheeze* try not to... pass out somewhere in a middle of the *sniff* room." I was crawling out of his bed. I was so cold and it was raining outside. I just need this blanket.

"He won't notice if I borrow this for a while," I whispered under my breath as I wrapped myself in Reiji's blanket.   
"I will return this *cough * after a week or so..." *enormous fit of coughing*  
"So, if you'll ex*cough*cuse me - I'mma go now." I was about to take a few unsteady steps, but dark figure stood in front of me like a wall.

"And where do you think you are going, you imbecile? You might be a pain to take care of, but it's going to be so worth it."   
"I don't like the look in your eyes." His eyes screamed 'pure evil'. I was about to 'run' like an old half dead lady, but he pushed me down. My head met his soft pillow again and fell in love from the first touch.

"Is your throat sore? Show it to me. Open you mouth and say..."  
"Aaaaaahhhh *cough*"  
"Red indeed. Now I'll check your temperature." Oh god no. He took out something from his pants.  
"Open you mouth..." Curse this pervert.  
"And suck on this." Kill me. Please. He forced a freaking pacifier thermometer into my mouth. Why did he even have it there?! I was about to spit it out, when...

"If you spit it out, like a bad, useless baby you are, I will have to use a completely different approach used on babies. And trust me - you would really hate this." He was holding a weird looking thermometer. I only knew two ways to measure temperature on babies and I'll stay with a pacifier, thank you.

"I'm a goohd babhy *Maggie Simpson sounds*."

"You are not a complete idiot, I see." Bastard was laughing. Oh I'll get to you one day.   
"Now, when everything's clear - time for some drugs."   
"You... mean... Meds? As in medication?"  
"I know what I said, mortal." Shuu, help. He forced my mouth open and poured something bitter into my throat.   
"Swallow." In my defense - my nose was clogged and my mouth was covered with his big hand - I had no other choise but to obey.

"How are you feeling?"  
"Like I'm you - lonely, pathetic and with a constant headache... Did I just say this out loud? Oh dear god I hope that Reiji did not think that this was my very first impression about him. How should I try to avoid the upcoming whipping? I KNOW! I'll just act like I'm having a hard time in school and he's the only one that can help me to understand a few subjects... Even though I know them so well I can teach him. That would feed his ego juuust fine... Did I just say this out loud? What the hell did you just give me, you four-eyed creep?! Oh my god I am so not fucking sorry...  
Am I going to die tonight?"

"It's a serum of truth. It's also good against diseases, sore throat and coughing. And no, you are not going to die - you're in good hands. And now, let's have a little questionary, shall we." That sick twisted evil bastard.

.......... ............ ........... ........... 

He asked me so many personal questions. He basically knew everything about me right now. Everything. I wish that that disease was more serious and I'd be dead by this time, but no - I'll have to live in shame. I'll have to face him every single day. After the serum lost it's effect - I was a normal sick burrito on Reiji's bed. I passed out the moment he gave me some sleeping pills. I woke up three days later. I was in my room - healthy as a horse. Maybe it was a dream, maybe it was just a horrible nightmare or a hallucination caused by the blood loss. Maybe...

Reiji walked into my room.

"Miss, 'my first crush was a dog from the TV series', please hurry up and get ready for school." Oh god no.


	8. Stretching with Laito a.k.a. - the worst mistake ever.

"Oh come on, it's not that bad."   
"And what do you know about the struggles of a female." I whined out in pain.  
"Nfu~, want me to help you with it? I know a perfect pose to solve this little problem of yours, Bitch-chan~," Laito basically purred out.

*Slap*

"Do not touch me." He removed his hands from my legs and fixed his hat.  
"Can't you take a little joke?"   
"I definitely don't want this kind of joke."   
"How do you know if you've never tried?" I stared at him blankly.  
"Can I kick you in the groin?" He frowned.  
"You might like it - you just have to try." I mocked his voice.

"You are really ungrateful, you know." Laito sighed. "And I was trying to help you."  
"I asked you to push me from behind - I said nothing about spreading my legs!" I yelled out.

"Nfu~ but thats the best stretching technique I've ever seen. Only very flexible girls can do that." Regret. Sudden regret came crashing into me. A little advice for anyone who's going to live in this cursed mansion: DO NOT accept Laito's help with your stretching routines. Just don't.

"That's the problem. I'm as flexible as an old tree branch and your perverted yoga poses are not going to work!" And don't even mention that you are going to fail your PE classes if you are not going to become into a woman snake by the end of the week. Ayato snitched on me, Reiji got angry at me and Laito was kind enough to help me.

"Just push me for crying out loud." I had to lay my head on my knees and I couldn't do it without a little help.   
"But that's not interesting." Laito pouted. "If you put your leg here and your hands here, you wouldn't feel any pain~."  
"No pain, no gain, buddy. Now do your job or I will tell Kanato that you ate his cookies."

"They are not cookies, Bitch-chan, they are macarons. My macarons."   
"He had already seen them." Laito's eyes widened.  
"You won't dare."   
"You think? I eat my own cooking. Cons-tant-ly. Today I had some cereal with soy milk and it was almost without fire. Almost." I laughed nervously.

"Did you set cereal on fire? How did you?.." Laito was dumbfounded.   
"Talent?"

§Flashback§

"After school breakfast tiimee~" I happily sang out while pouring some soy milk into my bowl.  
"Chichinashi, want to hear a secret?"  
"What is it?" I asked just to be polite   
"I will tell you, but you will have to pay for it." He smirked.  
"On a second thought, I'm not even that curious." I found my favorite spoon.

"Aren't you interested in my opinion?" I poured some cocoa cereal and mixed everything up with my favorite metal spoon.  
"Dude, I'm more interested in geography than your opinion and I fell asleep in that class... Twice." I took a spoonful of my heavenly meal but I almost spit it out. The milk was cold. Microwave it is.

"How dare you disrespect Ore-sama?!" He was stomping towards me. Oh this seemed dangerous.  
"Hey, Ayato, don't you want some takoyakis?" I asked hoping to calm him down.  
"Your excuse for takoyakis gave me food poisoning for the first time in my lifetime and you are asking if I want some more?" I managed to put my bowl into the microwave. I turned it on.

"The only kind of food you are able to create is your blood and even that one doesn't taste that good!" This got me angry.

"Hey, It's not my fault that I have to cook for myself! Reiji's food always had a weird impact on me and that probably made my blood taste funny. Or maybe it was because of my 'no fats' diet. Low cholesterol and all... But that's not the point!"

"Shut up and come here - I'm thirsty."   
"No. I'm hungry. If I don't eat - there will be no blood for you. And now, if you'll excuse me, I'll go enjoy my shitty life." I turn around towards the microwave just to see it sparkling and smoking.

"FIRE!!!" I screamed out. Ayato's attention got caught by the burning kitchen helper.  
"WHY IS IT BURNING?!" Ayato yelled out.  
"I DON'T KNOW!"  
"THE HELL DID YOU DO?!"  
"Pressed the button!"

Somehow, we were able to put out the fire. When we opened the microwave, we found what created this whole mess.  
"Chichinashi, why did you put a metal spoon in there?"   
"You were distracting me with your blood sucking talk." I tried to defend myself.

"Why do you always have to do something stupid?!" Ayato screamed out his question.  
"Why do you always have to suck blood?!" My voice was as loud as his.  
"I'm a vampire! That's my nature! What's your excuse?"   
"I'm an idiot! That's my nature!"

Ayato fell silent.   
"For the first time I can actually understand that silverware otaku."   
"Stop calling me like that then." Oh god no, not him. The kitchen was still smoking hot - there was no need for Reiji at the moment.

"I will clean that up, I swear." Saving my back from the whip was the only thing I could think about at the moment. "I will take care of this so please don't punish me." Bruises and wounds would be troublesome for PE and I have to get a good mark.

"I will allow you to choose: whipping or eating that mess you've made." Reiji elegantly flipped us off. Ayato was laughing.  
"Seriously, she will die if she eats that." He walked closer to me. "Guess who's going to fail PE classes after all, Pinocchio."

"She's failing her PE?" Reiji asked.  
"Hey! I asked you not to tell him." When it came to good grades, Reiji was as bad as my mom.  
"And I'm not that bad - I can reach my toes, so I just need a little stretching session and everything's going to be good... As long as my back and stomach are fine, so can you postpone my punishment, please?"

"I agree to do that, but with a price - from now on each day without punishment is worth five hits. You've already earned twenty hits with a whip for the fire." Reiji smirked at my horrified face.

"I'm looking forward to our little session." Failing is not that bad I guess. I think I will take the punishment today.   
"And don't even think about failing - that's fifty hits."

"That's too cruel..." I was whipped before and I knew one thing - I didn't like it. Well, maybe the first five hits were not so bad and I kinda enjoyed them, but another ten that usually followed were pretty bad. The wounds were a pain to take care of. I wouldn't be able to sleep on my back or side for a few weeks, I wouldn't be able to bath with hot water. It was like a sunburn, but a lot worse. And other brothers would constantly 'friendly' pat my back, just like my brother after a trip to the beach.

The day after tomorrow we will have PE so I will ask my teacher if I can do the task that day. I am NOT going to wait until the end of the month. My skin might be imperfect: with a few zits and small scars, but at least it was there. After Reiji, I would have to collect my precious skin piece by piece from the floor.

But I needed help. I had no clue on how to get more flexible. But who could help?

'Shuu is perfect for napping,  
Kanato is good when crying,  
Reiji is okay at whipping   
And Ayato when he's smirking.  
Subaru's good for boxing.  
And Laito is a god of...'

THAT'S IT! Laito should know a thing or two about being flexible. I should ask him to help me. He still owes me for that spider incident.

§End of a flashback§

"Nfufufufu~ That small poem you just said caught my attention, Bitch-chan~. What rhymes with 'boxing'? I am a god of what?" Why was this pervert blushing all of the sudden? "Come on, Bitch-chan, say it with your own lips. I want to hear that word coming out of your mouth~" I was sitting on the floor and he was behind me with his hands slowly moving from my back to my waist. I got a huge urge to slap his hands away from me.

"Chuckling. You're a god of chuckling."   
"Huh." His disappointed voice reached my left ear.   
"You chuckle all the damn time, what else could you be a god of?" I wasn't dense, I knew the 'f' word fit perfectly, but I wouldn't say that.

"Oh, I can show you~" He immediately spun me around and pushed me down, placing one hand on my tight while tightening the other around my neck. I still could breathe, but I was trapped in that position.

"Tonight I will show you what you are missing out in life." Laito whispered. His eyes were hungry, but not for blood. I think I just got myself into a very serious situation. I was getting sick to my stomach but I managed to keep my cool, knowing, that panic would only make things worse. There was no way of me overpowering him after all. I needed to think of something.

"What are you doing?" I will try to buy some time for now.  
"Something, that grown-ups do regularly. Something, that you should have experienced a long time ago. Something, that you will enjoy to the fullest." I tried to get away from him, but Laito only had to tighten his hand on my neck to force me into temporary submission.

"Oh~, no need to be so nervous, Bitch-chan, I promise I will take good care of you." He was starting to unzip my training suit. I tried to kick him, but that was no use.

"I'm still not an adult, so please stop." I demanded with serious voice.  
"Don't worry - I will make you into one soon." He purred out, his voice sending frisson of disgust through my entire body. It was not working. Talking wasn't working. Now I was starting to panic.

"LET ME GO!" Why did I even ask him for such a stupid thing? I would rather be beaten up into a pile of minced meat than be here with Laito. I should have known better than to even talk to him. I wouldn't be in such position if it wasn't for my stupidity.

"Are you about to cry? It's alright - I love you so don't get all worked up about it." He got his hand under my tank top. I flinched at his touch.  
"Even if your feelings were true, I don't love you and if I loved you - I still wouldn't want this."

"What are you talking about, Bitch-chan, I love you, can't you see?"   
"If you loved me, you wouldn't be assaulting me right now."   
"I'm not hurting you, I'm only showing you my love but how should you know about what true love is? You have no experience after all."

"I don't need experience to know that I don't want this! Don't touch me!" My voice could be really loud when I want it to be. I will use it against Laito.

"STOP TOUCHING ME YOU FUCKING PERVERT!" If my calculations were right, at least one brother heard my screaming. I've never done something like that - I didn't scream even when I was being whipped, so maybe someone will decide to interfere... I hope.

"You're being too loud, you know." He wasn't smiling anymore. Now I knew I got stuck in some deep shit. His grip got a lot stronger. I couldn't talk anymore. It was hard to breathe. I felt my tank top being ripped off and all I could do was helplessly gasp for air.

"Didn't I tell you that I'm always going to be the first everything?" Laito's head dropped in annoyance.  
"Come on, Ayato-kun, things were just getting interesting here." I could no longer feel his hands on me, but Laito was still on top of me in a way. I was taking huge gulps of air, still not being able to talk.

"She's mine. Stop touching her." Ayato growled out.  
"Nfu~ can't we share?" But thankfully Ayato was not in a mood for 'sharing is caring' nonsense. Laito stood up.  
"Get the hell out of this room, you fucking perverts, and you *points at me* shut the hell up - someone is trying to sleep," Subaru said. He also came over.

"No need to get so worked up, Bitch-chan. I was only teasing you." He winked.   
"That's not teasing - that's straight up torture."

"What's this ruckus all about?" Reiji appeared out of nowhere. I put on my training suit top and walked closer to him.

"Stretching with Laito got a bit out of control, but everything is fine now, I guess." I smiled. Ayato being possessive was really annoying, but it had its own perks.

"Next time be quieter. And Laito, you can't do that to her - father's orders."   
"Whatever." Laito frowned but soon his usual smirk came back.   
"And make sure she doesn't bring shame for the Sakamaki name in school." Reiji and the others left my room.

Bitch-chan~ sit down."  
"Like hell I will." I was still reasonably angry at him.  
"Do it." My body automatically followed his orders.  
"Now, lean towards your toes." I hesitated. Was he really going to act as if he wasn't trying to do something horrible just a few minutes ago?

"Oh, maybe you want to be whipped?" I started to reach out for my toes. Suddenly, I felt his hands on my back.  
"Have fun with this, Bitch-chan~" Having said that, he pushed me all the way down. My head successfully hit my knees. It hurt like hell. I thought that something in my legs and back was going to rip.

"OH THE CURSED TENTACLES IT HURTS! LET GO!"  
"No pain - no gain, right, Bitch-chan? You have to stay like this for a few minutes." I honestly couldn't breathe at first, but pain was slowly fading away. Laito was humming and so I was starting to relax.

.......... .......... ........... ......... ........

"I can feel you getting relaxed, should we continue on our previous activity, hm~?" I leaned closer to her neck once again, but she wasn't responding.  
"Bitch-chan?" I lifted her up a bit.   
"Asleep? That's no fun then." I let her fall on the floor with a thump. Teasing her was a lot more interesting when she was awake.


	9. Revenge against Kanato

I was home alone tonight. Since Kanato had his fun with my back, I wasn't able to go to school for a whole week. Classmates and teachers would have noticed my weird and stiff movements so we all 'friendly' decided to let me stay at home...

This was the first night I wasn't tied down to the bed... Even thought for the first few days there was no need to do so, because I could barely move. But now I managed to convince Reiji to leave me free so I could use bathroom once in a while.

"Hello? Is anybody here?" Just to be sure. Silence.  
"I'm going to drink some tea in your room!" Nothing. Reiji was out for sure.  
"I'm going to paint your iron maiden pink! With my little pony pattern!" Crickets. Ayato was byeyato.  
"Shuu, I will... Meh." He wouldn't care anyways.

"Oh look at that! What a beautiful rose garden! I wonder what could go wrong if I found a lawn mower! Oh my - there's one over there!" So Subaru was really suffering in school after all.

Laito would already be in my room, giving me a back massage. I still had rope burns on my wrists and ankles from the last one he gave me. So Laito was also gone.

Kanato would already be here to slap me shut. I was free to do whatever I wanted. I've been waiting for this opportunity for ages! Where should I start?

Should I dance in the music room? Wait no... Stupid Reiji. OH! I know! I have always wanted to lay down into a coffin like Dracula and rise like a zombie... From my back. Curse that whip! I think I'll settle with some Netflix and chilly vanilla ice-creams I've been saving up for an emergency.

Slowly, without making any sudden movements, I reached our fridge. I have hidden this wonderful milky piece of human creation in the place no vampire would look into - obentou with my cooking.

I could already imagine the taste of the cool dessert. The way my spoon would destroy the smooth surface of the white miracle. The way my tongue would be covered with the sticky white substance...

The way I will rip off someone's balls for eating MY ice-creams! How dare he?! I still didn't know who exactly that 'he' was, but I will find out who left my box of happiness empty. Was it Ayato? Subaru?! No. Whoever ate my ice-cream used a fork. These two use spoon for things like that, maybe knife, but not a fork. So, who was crazy enough to check out my cooking?

My eyes widened. As fast as my back allowed me, I check all cabinets and the fridge. There was nothing sweet. Nothing. Which means... Which means!

Kanato.

His sugar resources must've ended and out of desperation he was looking everywhere for a dose of sugar. He must have been REALLY desperate to check my box. Every single day I was literally dreaming about my delicious treat just to find nothing. I was filled with rage.

My parents kicked me out, Elara cheated on me, I had to literally beg for the wifi password, I was almost killed on my first night here, I have to share my bed with at least three perverts, they took away control over my own body and deepest secrets with the help of drugs. All I had left was food and they took away that too.

Slowly, my rage was fading away. I felt helpless and crushed. I leaned back on the fridge but regretted that immediately. Running away was pointless. With these wounds I wouldn't be able to even walk three miles and the woods were a lot larger than that.

I think I knew the way to leave this place. It will hurt.

§One week later§  
Kitchen

"Hi, I'm crazy and this is Jackass."  
"Who are you talking to?"  
"The audience and shut up."  
"Huuuh? Are you telling Ore-sama to shut up?"

"Yes. Now be a good little sucker you are obviously not, shut up and watch." Ayato was about to protest, but once he noticed what I was doing, he smirked.

I was making cookies with spices. I put everything I could find into the dough except for sugar. Things with food might go dangerous even when I didn't want them to, so just imagine the destructive force of my intended bad cooking. Here they were - perfectly baked goods. This time they were not burned.

"I see Bitch-chan is cooking. So, who's the victim?"  
"Guess."  
"Is it the one who ate your..?"  
"Yes. Now shut up or you will spoil it."  
"Just how bad are these?" Asked Ayato. I think I need to do some testing to find out.

"I think they are dangerous enough to kill... I'mma have one." I was about to take a bite, but Laito slapped it out of my hand.  
"Bad suicidal Bitch-chan, bad~ If you want to die, I can always lend you a hand~"

"Over my dead body." I hissed.  
"Nfu~ If that's what you want~" He was walking towards me.  
"Wait. You want to test these, right?" Ayato, I'm starting to kinda like you.  
"Yeah, what about it?"  
"I know one person who's perfect for this."

.......... .............. ............. .............

*knock* *knock*

"Subaru, if you're there, please open the door - I need to apologize about something." Almost immediately his door slammed wide open.

"The hell did you do this time!?"  
"Actually nothing, besides mowing the lawn... Cookies?" I stuck out the plate. He was hesitant. I took a glance to my left where Ayato and Laito were hiding just behind the corner. Laito waved encouraging me to continue.

"Don't worry - they are homemade."  
"Do you really think I would eat that?"  
"Who could've thought that Subaru is afraid of a little cookie. And I thought you were a man."

 

He slammed a nearby wall with his fist.

"How dare you?! Give me the plate."  
"Just be careful - they are still hot." Unfortunately, Subaru ignored my warning. He threw two cookies into his mouth and started chewing furiously. I could see his face twist in disgust.

"Subaru, do you taste anything unusual?" He didn't answer. He stopped chewing, but didn't swallow either.  
"You don't have to force yourself. Here, take this." I gave him a bucket which he took immediately. He spit out everything. I also had a glass of water that I offered immediately.

"Sorry you had to eat this."  
"What the hell was that?!"  
"Sugar-free revenge."

............ ............ .............. ............

"Why did you dip them into chocolate?" Ayato asked.

"So he wouldn't feel the taste immediately. He will have to chew it first."  
"Smart move." Subaru whispered, still chewing mint bubble gum I gave him.

"So what are you planning to do now, Bitch-chan?"  
"Just watch and see."

I sat down on the couch with a book and a plate of snacks. Laito was 'sleeping' on another one, Subaru and Ayato were watching football games.

I was holding a 'half eaten' cookie in my hand while chewing the bubble gum. Now, all I had to do was wait.

"Human, what are you eating?" And here comes the fun.

"A cookie, but these are mine - I bought them for myself."  
"Teddy, is this moron telling me that I can't get some sweets?"

Hi, Crazy speaking again and this is 'Pulling the lion on its tail'. Remember, kids - don't try this at home. All of the tricks in this show were performed by suicidal professionals.

"Your Teddy says that these are mine. Go and make your own."  
Laito opened one eye, Subaru lowered the TV volume and Ayato bit down his lip to stop himself from laughing.

"Teddy, what kind of dress would fit this lowlife? Red or a green one? I think I will go with white, dying it blood red in process."  
"In a process of what?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

Kanato smiled.  
"In a process of hanging you on your own intestines." I instinctively clutched down to my stomach.  
"C-cookie?" I offered him the entire plate. He smacked it out of my hands.

"How dare you offer me your leftovers!?" His hand traditionally wrapped itself around my neck.

"You say that these are yours, right? So why don't you eat them? This human wants to eat her cookies, so why don't we give her some." My eyes widened in fear.

Kanato threw me on the floor and sat on top of me, making me unable to move. He picked up a couple of cookies and tried to force them into my mouth. I was shacking my head like a baby that was already full. He squeezed my neck again. I was trying to keep my mouth shut, but couldn't. The moment my mouth opened - he pushed two cookies into my mouth and covered it with his hand.

"Are they tasty?" These were the worst cookies I have ever had in my mouth. Not only my tongue, but entire body was crying.

"NMMMMM" Subaru, please, you know how horrible these were, so why won't you help a fellow tongue?

"Chew them." Kanato ordered. "Do it or I will feed you to the dogs." This convinced me to do what I was told. Don't cry, please, don't cry. And for the love of the remaining bit of honor - don't puke.

"Now swallow it." Ayato and Laito snickered. Stupid perverts. I did what I was told. I can't say that it went down well - I gagged a few times.

"Look, Teddy, stupid human actually ate it," Kanato evilly chuckled. Then leaned down to my ear.

"Teddy saw you baking." I was at loss of words. Teddy was in the kitchen while I was doing my thing, but he was just a freaking toy, right? Or maybe...  
Maybe it was a kind you buy to secretly watch how nannies babysit your kids. Could Teddy actually be a secret camera?

"I'm expecting a compensation for this." After saying that, Kanato stood up and left.

"Your plan has failed."  
"No shit, Sherlock."  
"What did you just..."  
"I have another one."  
"So Bitch-chan is still up and kicking."  
"Of course I am. Let's get down to business. Can I ask all three of you to lend me something?"

............ .............. ............ .............

Kanato was in a mood to visit the previous brides. When still alive, they were really annoying, but once they were turned into the human sized dolls - they were quite nice to be around. They no longer had blood, but at least they looked nice.

Kanato was about to enter the room of his precious creations, but he found a note on the door.

'Dear Kanato,  
Hope you will like my designed collection.'

"What does that mean?" Kanato was wondering. He opened the door just to come face to face with a horrendous sight - sacrificial brides wearing speedos.

........... ............... .............. ..............

Kanato's scream echoed through the entire mansion and forest.

"This is one hell of a fashion shriek right here," I giggled. All three partners in crime were already laughing their heads off.

At first, when I asked them for speedo swimming suits, they almost got angry... Except for Laito. But when I explained why I needed them, even Subaru found a few in his drawer.

The hardest part was putting them on. I couldn't remove their wedding dresses, so I had to put speedos on top of their clothing. Some brides had their skirts tucked into the speedos, some had them hanging out of the holes for legs. Some even had Superman and Batman capes and masks on.

Of course, it was pretty creepy at first. Dead bodies and all, but once you get used to their glassy eyes following every single move you made, it got a little bit less creepy...

Oh who am I kidding? I ran out of that place the moment we were finished. Ayato and Laito helped me to dress poor girls up and Subaru guarded the door. I wouldn't have done this without their help. So, to thank them all - I will take the entire blame.

We were in the entertainment room (A.n. I don't know how to call it (^○^)ゞ). Laito was crushing Ayato in a game of darts and Subaru was destroying me in a game of pool.

"I said that I was no good with balls."  
"You just need some practice."  
"Nfu~ I can teach you~"  
"NO. Never again!" I was ready to hit him with my stick. Laito put his hands into the air.

"No need to get violent, Bitch-chan. I was only trying to help."  
"I remember the last time you were 'trying to help' and let me tell you one thing..." I couldn't finish my sentence because some unknown force of pure rage slammed me against the wall. Again.

"YOU DID THIS!" Kanato was screaming right into my face. His eyes were blood red and fangs have never seemed so long. I could feel Kanato's nails digging into my skin. If he squeezed my neck just a little bit stronger - he would either crush it or snap my head off.

"...what... are... you... talking... about..?"  
"YOU KNOW WHAT!" He threw me across the room. Once again my body hit the wall, just this time I could feel something snapping. It was so painful to breathe that I looked like a fish out of water - trying to inhale but not being able to.

Kanato was walking towards me and I could see that he was about to kick me, but Subaru pushed him away.

"What is going on in here?" Reiji appeared. By this point Kanato was going berserk. Subaru needed help to restrain him so Ayato jumped in to help.

"He... obviously... has no... sense of... fashion..."  
"I WILL GUT YOU RIGHT HERE!" Kanato ignored everyone but me. His eyes never left me.

"Would you stop provoking him?" Reiji used his mom voice.  
"Sorry... but he... deserved it..."  
"LET ME GO!" Kanato was trashing around, tears of rage were already forming.  
"Is it because of your ice-cream?" I nodded.

"Seriously, I thought you wouldn't get any more stupid, but here you are." Oh shut up, as if you didn't whip me once because I borrowed your book without permission.

"What ice-cream?" Kanato seemed to be confused.  
"I haven't eaten ice-cream in months!" What? Kanato was already crying.  
"Are we talking about your blue box?" Reiji knew something. I nodded again.  
"The one who ate your dessert was that dead-beat." What. Have. I. Done.

"Kanato... I'm so... Sorry."  
"Come on, Kanato-kun, let's fix your dolls."

I was left alone with Reiji.  
"Stand up. You look ridiculous like this."  
"I think... I'm fine... like this." I closed my eyes trying to focus on breathing.  
"Seriously, what a pain you are." I felt his hands on my chest. I flinched.  
"Where do you... think you're... touching?" I wanted to smack his hands away, but couldn't.

"I'm counting how many ribs you've broken."  
"What?" I have never broken a single bone in my life and now I had this mess?  
"Yes, I think this time you might need a trip to hospital."  
"But I feel fine... OHH GOD!" Reiji put some pressure into his touch just to prove his point.

"Stand up." He forced me on my feet. I was able to stand, but walking was a bit harder task. I also couldn't straighten my back.

"What a bother." He picked me up bridal style. Oh the irony.  
"When will you stop injuring yourself?"  
"The exact... moment I die..." Reiji carried me to his room. Once again I met his bed and soft pillow. He continued his inspection. After he was done touching me, he started asking questions.

"Do you feel a stabbing pain in your chest?"  
"No."  
"Can you take deep breaths?"  
"I don't... even want to... try."  
"Do you feel any sort of pressure in your chest area?"  
"I don't... think so. So, how... many?" I asked.  
"Seems like you just fractured a few ribs - nothing serious." Reiji also had checked my neck and back, trailing with his fingers every single bruise that was still there.

"Should I use bandage around your chest and watch you suffer from pneumonia? Just imagine not being able to breathe because of your ribs and lung infection." I didn't know what this pneumonia was and I really didn't want to find out.

"I think... that I will... pass on this one." Reiji walked away from me to his little laboratory. After mixing something he returned with a blue syringe.

 

"What's that?"  
"Zydrate."  
"Zydrate?"

"Did I stutter?" He was about to stab my arm but I pulled it out of his hand  
"No. No more... drugs."  
"Refusing painkillers? You must really like pain." He put down the blue liquid and instead put a pack of ice on my chest.

"Put ice three time a day for twenty minutes and don't forget to cough and take deep breaths every hour or you know what will happen."  
"What?" Reiji sighed.  
"Pneumonia. Now leave."  
" I kinda... can't." This time Reiji was probably not in the mood so he just teleported with me into my room and dropped me on my Shuuless bed.

This night was the longest night in my life, because it hurt really bad. I started feeling strong regret for refusing that zydrate thing. I found some pills of advil and I took them but they were not much of a help.

It took three weeks for me to heal. Recovery time would have been longer, but I stopped refusing Reiji's medicine.

So, a few things that I've learned:  
1) always check whose blame it really is;  
2) make your revenge untraceable;  
3) don't play Jackass with Kanato.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's going to show up on the next chapter. That's right! Vampires and a human girl!
> 
> No, actually there will be a few new faces here and there...
> 
> Hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	10. Not a princess

It was a wonderful winter morning. A few delicate snowflakes have been playing around, racing, which one would stay in the air the longest.

I was in my bathroom, enjoying my morning routine. I had a green facial mask on, my hair was also covered in white mixture with a bag on to keep everything in its place. The sight was horrendous, but the feeling was pretty nice.

I was only wearing a towel. I know - bad decision, but you only live as long as your mentally unstable house mates allow you to. So at least I could enjoy my life without any regrets.

I put on my life saviors - earphones and turned on the music. I wanted something fast, something weird and something I could dance to. Here it was - this song was perfect 'Nine inch nails - Closer'. I turned the sound to the maximum and began dancing and singing. The rhythm and the creepiness of the music made me feel like a performer in a strip club so I let my body do what it wanted.

Room was black, only a few red lights were pointed straight at me. I was on stage, moving my body to the rhythm of the music. Some people were cheering every time I made a certain move, some were in awe and the others were throwing money at me.

I was so into singing and dancing I didn't notice something I should have. And so I continued to sing the last part of the chorus.  
"You get me closer to OH DEAR GOD!" I was beyond freaked out. Right in front of my pointed finger was the one and only Ayato Sakamaki.  
"Finally, you've recognized Ore-sama as your real master and god." What was he doing here?!

"Ayato... Can I ask you for a favor? Can you kill me right here right now. Please." He saw my dance. I couldn't continue on living anymore. The only escape from this shame was death.

"Gladly, but seeing you die out of shame every time you see me is way better." Sadistic bastard. But only now it clicked to me. He didn't only see me dance in such a way, oh no, he saw me dance like this practically nude, only with a towel. Red like a ladybug, I secured towel more tightly around myself.

"Get out!" I screamed, embarrassment made me feel like I have been showering in lava.

"You have nothing to be ashamed of, I mean, just look at you." Honestly, I was surprised. Did Ayato the Great compliment me? It was true - I was doing some squats and planks every now and then.

"Well thank you..."  
"There's no need to be hiding something that isn't even there." He was laughing so hard he fell to the ground clutching his belly.

If an impossible thing happened and this thing called 'my life' was anime series, I'd have my head lowered down, black shadows would be covering my eyes, my arms spread to the both sides like cowboy's and a very dark energy would be pouring out of me like flames from hell.

Ayato wiped away a few tears he had and raised his eyes to meet mine. For a moment, I could see and feel one thing - he forgot that he was the vampire in the room, not me. His face showed a bit of genuine fear when he saw a very hot curling iron in my hand

"Oh shit." His eyes widened.  
"You better run." He did just that. I unplugged the curling iron and followed him.  
"Save yourselves! The crazy Titless has a weapon!" His laughter could be heard from a long distance.

"Seriously, Ayato, why are you even running? She can't do anything to you. *sigh* Teddy, why are we the only thinking creatures here?" Kanato was just passing by, so I didn't touch him. I didn't want any more broken ribs.

"And I have boobs! They're just too small to be seen!" I gave up on running. Shoot! Now I had to take a shower once again. I was sweaty. Embarrassment and exercise did its job.

"Nfu~ we still have to make sure about it. May I check it to confirm your hypothesis?"

"Do you want a taste of this?!" Laito, who was standing at the entrance of his room only chuckled.  
"Thank you, Bitch-chan, but I'm already full."

Angry as Reiji after seeing the kitchen, I stomped back to my room, got ready for school and walked towards the limo. I didn't notice that someone cut my earphones. This realization hit me, when I was already sitting in the car, trying to listen to something calming. I had no time to get my spare ones. Shoot.

So here I was - sitting in the limo, trying not to see my breakfasts once again. The motion sickness is a curse I had since my early childhood. The only cure for this, without using the meds, was listening to music through my earphones. I had no idea how, but it worked every time.

Unfortunately, my precious belonging, my long thin knight in the black armor had been destroyed.

"What's wrong, Bitch-chan? Why are you so pale? Did someone drink too much?" I gagged.  
"Don't... Mention... Food." I was sitting as still as possible, with my eyes closed. Both hands were clutching the seat, nails were digging into the leather.

"Aw, is our little girl nauseous?" Laito was a master at faking his concern.  
"How come you never got sick before?" Asked Ayato.  
"Did you cook for yourself this time?" I shook my head.

"Who would've thought that such a prude like yourself could be pregnant." Shuu's comment was ridiculous.  
"First of all... I'm not a.... prude. Second - I'm not... pregnant, you..." A wave of nausea stopped me from saying more.

"It all started in the limo. It's probably motion sickness. Sometimes humans get that." Thank you, Subaru. I'm so happy you know so much about cars.

"And how do we stop this?" Kanato asked.  
"Why would you want to make her feel better? Just look at her - weak like a newborn baby, pale like one of us and completely defenseless. We can do anything we want with her."

"Nfu, Ayato-kun is right. Right now, I can do this." He pulled me into his lap. I was sitting there like a small child on Santa's knees, but I felt more like a little boy with a weird priest. Laito made me lean back against his chest. I did try to struggle, but with no success. So I gave up.

"She's my Teddy now~" He hugged me like a toy.

"Don't... move me around, or I will..."  
"You will what, Bitch-chan?"   
"She will cover you with her breakfast. She ate a lot by the way." Laito slightly tensed up at Shuu's words, but he didn't let me go.

"So no moving you around, hmm. I'm fine with that, as long as I can do this." His hand was creeping up towards my chest. Now I was the one to tense up even more.  
"Stop it, you pervert." Subaru saved me once again.

"You're such a party pooper, Subaru-kun. Let's postpone the check-up for later." Why must this 'morning' be cursed? I kept getting myself into these weird situations where I had no escape from.

But the rest of the ride was peaceful. I'm not too proud to admit it, but being cuddled by Laito was quite enjoyable. I even relaxed in his lap and closed my eyes, savoring the sensation. A few months have passed since I had a real, comforting or plain simple hug from someone who wasn't about to bite me. I was a human, after all. Even I could get a bit less happy without a hug or two.

And my nausea ceased a little bit. I guess his hands made me feel more stable than the car seat.

Limo stopped. I heard everyone leave the car.   
"We're here, Teddy-chan~ Oh, maybe you want to stay here for a bit longer. We'd be all alone~"  
"Nope. I'm getting out of here." I pushed myself away from him, still weak from the ride, but he allowed me to go. With shaky legs, I stepped out. Limo drove off. This school even has a parking lot for limousines. Can you believe it? Damn rich people.

"Teddy-chan, are you sure you don't want more?"   
"I'm pretty damn sure I would use more than just a hot curling iron on you if you tried anything more. Now, give me a second - I need to talk my scrambled eggs out of emigration."

"Huh?" Ayato gave me a funny look.  
"She means... Actually, stand up right in front of her and force a takoyaki into her mouth and enjoy the outcome." Reiji fixed his glasses. Everyone were stunned to see Reiji lose his patience with Ayato.

"The way you said it says it all." Ayato walked away, knowing that he shouldn't trust his brother. Soon after, the bell rang.   
"Shit guys - we're going to be late!"  
"A correction: not 'shit', but shiitake mushrooms and not 'we', but you."

After saying that, Reiji vanished into thin air. And so did Kanato and Laito. Even Subaru was walking faster than usual. Only Shuu stayed on the bench near by.

"Aren't you going?"  
"It's not worth it."  
"PE?"   
"PE." Poor Shuu, but I had no time to comfort my couch potato club mate.

"Sorry, but I can't stay with you - I have English."  
"Hurry up, I heard your teacher was worse than us."   
"Oh snap you're right. Bye!" With my motion sickness gone, I broke out onto a full speed sprint.

I've reached my classroom faster than I thought was even possible.   
"Good morning, I'm really sorry for being late." I bowed down towards the direction of our teacher's desk the moment I stepped my foot into the classroom. A few girls giggled. That was a good sign.

"Stop this nonsense - she's not here."   
"That's a relief." I cried out and sat down in front of my friend. "I made it. And I thought I was done for."   
"You made it, but apparently, your backpack didn't."   
"What do you mean?.. OH shiitake rooster I left my books!" I was sprinting again.

Why me? Of all people, why I was the one to leave my books in the damn limo? I ran past sleeping Shuu.  
"PE? I thought you had English," Asked apparently awake Shuu.  
"It's not English - it's survival and I'm that blond moron from the movie 'Scream'!" I didn't hear his response, I was too busy running back with a backpack.

I was in the school once again. Only a few hallways and staircases and I will be saved. The hallways were already empty. That was a really bad sign. I'm sorry, Reiji, but shit!

I was running towards the staircase. Two guys just went downstairs and were walking towards me. Once they noticed me (which wasn't really that hard) a smaller one spread his arms wide open.

"Come here." Both of them were snickering. My instant natural reaction was to jump back immediately.

"Oh god no, ew no!" If you didn't know what was happening, from my facial expression you might have thought that I had stepped into a dog poo. The big guy was laughing like a madman. But the blond guy seemed to be confused.

"You're not a princess yourself, you know and don't you know who I am?"  
"If we were talking about my luck - you're a sadistic, bloodthirsty vampire who uses weird manipulation tactics to get what he wants." His eyes widened. His friend stopped laughing.

"How did you?.."  
"Wait... YOU ARE?!" And this was the moment I knew - my fortune's smile had fangs. Fangs, thirsty for my blood.

"Shut up, Kou!" Kou's friend snapped at the yellow guy.  
"I'm really sorry about my brother. He's an idol, you see, so sometimes he might get a bit too full of himself. He thinks that everyone should know him."

"And what about that vampire stuff?"  
"He's preparing for a role in the um uh... drama... 'Demonic... boyfriends'... He's a vampire in there, right, Kou?"  
"Uh yeah. Neko-chan, I was just rehearsing my lines. You shouldn't be worried about anything." They were seriously trying to convince me that Kou wasn't a vampire. Even for normal girl this would've been suspicious.

"And what about the fact that you've been trying to honestly convince me he's not a vampire?" They had those 'Oh shit she's right' looks on their faces.

"Bwahahaha I'm just kidding, jee. I mean, vampires? Really? They exist only in books and movies. See ya later - gotta go hear out a scolding from my teacher." And I ran off, leaving two very confused vampires behind. What I didn't know was that one of them knew I was actually well aware about their true nature.

"This Neko-chan is quite interesting."   
"But she got you good. Man, the look on your face when she jumped away from you."   
"Stop laughing, Yuma."   
"She looked at you as if you were covered in cow shi..."  
"I said shut up!"  
"I must tell Ruki and Azusa."   
"I will burn your garden if you do so."  
"Worth it."


	11. The horrors of PE

"Girls and boys, we all know about how your body works so don't be shy and ask any question you want."

This is it - the downfall of a human kind. A long time ago people thought that babies were given by God, then they realized the truth somehow. In the medieval times adult things were considered as impure and evil. But that's in the past. Right now, people are becoming more and more free about their views, but not as free as the Ancient people - good old greeks and romans. A lot of different civilizations had created entire traditions for THAT, but Christianity and other religions like that stopped everything. But human kind didn't stop celebrating their reproduction. They brought back their ancestors philosophy and teaching about THAT. In this, twenty first century, you can't even listen to the radio without THAT. You can't even buy a single journal without facing at least one article about THAT. Even TV and computer games are stuffed with THAT. So why, oh why do I still have to listen about IT from no one other, but HIM?!

Laito Sakamaki was obviously enjoying himself. He even had fake reproduction organ models, both male and female (let's note the fact that school was against having these 'indecent' things so it wasn't from our school). Our PE teacher got sick and Reinhart sensei was busy with a few drunk to death students after the chemistry class about alcohols. Some wanted to test if methanol was really that poisonous. So, long story short - teachers decided to ask Laito for some help. He agreed a bit too easily for it to not be suspicious.

"And please, call me Laito-sensei."   
"Okay, Laito-sensei." All girls, including the substitute teacher immediately said.  
"Over my dead body." Hissed Ayato.  
"What was that? A naughty boy wants to get detention~?" Laito smirked, knowing that he had the power over all of us. Three classes were brought to the auditorium for this. It was a work of fortune or the devil itself, but Reinhart sensei picked out classes with all of the Sakamaki brothers. And so all of us were watching this little show.

I could visually see Reiji's rage. He was shaking, his fists were clenched so hard they were whiter than his gloves he usually wore at home. I didn't know why, but I was sandwiched between two weird guys: one with a choker and the other with an even more ridiculous hat than Laito's. Reiji was in front of me and Subaru was seated behind me so it was really easy to see Reiji's reaction to Laito being his 'sensei'.

"For me to fall this low. For me to be taught by him." I pat Reiji's shoulder to comfort him.  
"I know, right. We're all in this together. Do you remember me waking up screaming and running straight to your room?"   
"Yes, I remember."  
"This scene was in my nightmare."   
"Now I do understand why you were so disturbed."

When I was a little girl, like all kids, I was suffering from nightmares. Some were nothing, but three stood out to this day. Two dreams contained dead, headless bodies trying to kill me and the entire world being consumed by flames. I woke up terrified and frightened, so I did what all kids after a nightmare do - I ran to my mom. And since this mansion didn't have my mother somewhere hidden - I ran to mama Reiji.

At first, he wanted to cuff me in the dungeons, but soon he changed his mind. Apparently, my pathetic trembling and stuttering state was something unusual to see. The only time I cried in this mansion was the time with Laito when that monster landed on his bed. Not even beatings and whippings made me cover in fear, so Reiji, being a natural sadist, decided to entertain himself for a little bit.

"Please don't talk in my lesson. Now, when explanation part is over, ask anything you want." A boy to my right raised his hand.  
"What is it, Azusa-kun?"  
"Is it true... that girls... are in a lot of pain... from time... to time?" Looking at him more closely - I could see scars on his face and his arms were bandaged.

"Yes. Some experience terrible pain and some don't feel a thing. Any more questions?" The same boy raised his hand again.  
"What is it again, Azusa-kun?"   
"Can I... turn into... a girl?" I sat there, thinking 'He's either masochistic or crazy to want period cramps'.

"Nfu~ you might, but there would be no pain. Getting a surgery won't change your insides, so you wouldn't be able to..."  
"I beg you pardon," Reiji interrupted Laito-sensei, "You are wrong. There is a way to turn him into a real girl. I've developed a gender changing potion. Everyone can change into the opposite sex. Even vampi..." I slapped my hands over Reiji's mouth.

No one needed to know that they were vampires. There were lots of girls who still cared about Twilight, Vampire Diaries and Vampire Knight. I was surrounded by the vampires right now. Literally. If fangirls found out about real vampires - I would be turned into minced meat immediately.

I leaned closer to Reiji's ear, still holding his mouth shut and his head turned straight at Laito.  
"Do you wanna die? Don't you understand the power of fangirls? They would cut you to pieces and sell you on eBay. Now, be a good boy and shut up before I sold you to the Buffy the vampire slayer fandom myself."

Reiji calmly removed my hands from his mouth, almost crushing my fingers but didn't let go of them.  
"As you wish, milady." He bit my pinky finger with one of his fangs. I bit down my bottom lip to suppress my voice.

"I wasn't expecting to see Reiji Sakamaki acting so unsightly in a public place." Boy to my left with a black choker said cheerfully.  
"Who are you to talk, mongrel?" Reiji snapped back. He was obviously not in the mood to care about his image right now. I had to do something about this and fast or this will turn into a vampire fight... Wait... THIS GUY WAS ALSO A VAMPIRE?!

"Reiji-san, Mongrel-san, please be aware of your surroundings - fight somewhere in the woods when all of this is over." Reiji sighed, fixing his glasses.

"Fine, but you'll get punished when were back home."   
"What did you just call me, you human pest?"  
"Reiji-kun, for the last time - stop interrupting my lesson or you will get detention and Ruki-kun - same goes for you." Honestly, I wasn't expecting Laito to be so professional and serious about giving sex education, but here I was - sitting there, listening about the wonders of adult life that I wished to avoid in the future.

My mom has always dreamed about having grandkids. She has talked about holding my or my brother's little baby in her hands for the first time for ages. She has even picked out 'perfect' names and room decorations. Every single Christmas she talked about how wonderful it would be to have some little bundles of joy running around once again. Even my grandma tried to hook me up with my childhood friend.

A shiver ran down my spine. Thanks not. I could barely keep my head on the neck (with a few bumps and bruises I must say), so how am I going to raise a needy and delicate child?

"Why do I have to listen to this crap?!" Finally, Subaru informed everyone about his existence.   
"If I have to put up with another five minutes with this pervert - all of you will need a lecture about CPR." He was shaking in rage. I was waiting for Reiji to step in, but he didn't. The cocky bastard was waiting for someone to knock out Laito for good.

But a knight in gold and pink rose up from his seat. The same idol guy I've met before.  
"Subaru-kun~ There's no need for violence. Now, come on - take my hand and..." *WHACK* Subaru hit him.  
"Oh look - a first volunteer." Subaru grabbed poor idol by the hair and pulled him towards the stage where Laito was showing a proper way to use contraception.

"Now, the first thing you have to do is check if your victim, oh sorry, a beating bag is still conscious." Subaru slapped Kou on one cheek.  
"Why is it alway me?!" Kou cried out.  
"If your victim is still able to talk - *SMACK* give him anesthesia." Kou was still standing on his own, but already swaying from side to side.

"Now, you have to make sure to open his airway." Subaru grabbed poor guy by the neck and squeezed it.   
"Shu-Shu-ba-ru-kun, I-can't breathe-"  
"Very well, now, give your Balboa meat two rescue breaths." He slapped Kou on both cheeks. Hard. Really hard.

"Now, let's begin the chest compressions, shall we." Kou was shaking his head, trying to free himself from the iron death lock of Subaru.

"And remember, kids, you have to do this to the ryhthm of a few songs, like   
Stayin' Alive by Bee Gees, I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor or Heartbreaker by Mariah Carey ft Jay Z . That's 100 to 120 beats per minute." Subaru cracked his neck, getting ready to bring a vampire boy back to life and then dead once again, but a much taller guy interfered.

"You should not do that." It was the same tall guy from the previous time. He seemed to be strong. A lot stronger than Subaru. White haired vampire just stared at the tall guy for a few moments before letting Kou go.

(A/n - ATTENTION! This is not a proper way to bring someone from dead! But if you want to send someone to the other side... Don't tell anyone it was me who taught you this ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯)

"Paramedics have arrived, so there's no need for the rescue from your side anymore." Subaru turned around to face a terrified substitute teacher.  
"I told you this was a bad idea to force me into this 'event'," Vampire said with disgust and stormed out.

"Thanks, Yuma." Kou rubbed his neck.  
"Why didn't you try to fight him back?" Yuma asked.  
"Not in front of my fans. I have to keep up my image, you know."   
"You just looked like a loser."   
"You know nothing about show business. Just watch." And Kou was right - from all three classes about half of the girls were coming to see if their favourite idol was okay.

"Kou-kun, I was so worried about you!"  
"That's right that's right."  
"I was so scared when Subaru said he will give you a rescue breath!"  
"THAT'S RIGHT THAT'S RIGHT!"  
"Girls, please," Kou laughed nervously.  
"Are you done now? Can I continue?" Laito was furiously tapping his foot.

"What do you want, Hat boy?" Laito just smirked at Yuma's words.  
"To see you in a detention class. Miss Shihouni, the honor is yours." Yuma's eyes were already dissecting Laito on the spot like a pig.  
"Yuma, you have detention."

"Bwahahaha, what a loser!" Ayato was rolling around in his seat, clutching his belly.   
"Ayato-kun~" Laito said with a smile. "Detention."   
"YOU CAN'T DO THIS!" Ayato screamed out.  
"He," Yuma cracked his knuckles, "I'll be waiting for you." Tall vampire left through the same door as Subaru.

"I ship them." I whispered.  
"You what? What does that mean?" A guy to my left asked.  
"Well, um, you see, when you want to get rid of someone, you say 'I ship you'. It usually goes with pairs, like Yuma and Ayato. I wanted them to get away, to be 'shipped away', so that's why I said that I shipped them." Kou was not looking at us, Reiji's back was slightly shaking - probably because of the laughter. Please, Mongrel-san, please buy this story.

"Is that so?" Mongrel-san raised an eyebrow. "So why did Kou fans said the exact same thing when we walked in? Aren't they supposed to adore him?" Oh damn it - he got me.   
"Those? Those are no regular fans, oh no. Those are fangirls. They might get overprotective over their little idol."

"Fangirls? I've never read about them. What are those?"   
"You don't know them?!" I screamed out my question.  
"Bitch-chan~ I know we had a few ~private~ lessons, but could you please keep it down?" He winked at me. A wave of screams echoed through the room. Angry. Exited. Disappointed. You could pick up an entire list of emotions from that noise.

"What the hell is this?!" Mongrel-san covered his ears.   
"One word - fangirls." I smiled, ignoring the heat of anger and embarrassment on my cheeks that were lit up by Laito's comment. And no - there was nothing between us. "And how do you not know what a fangirl is? Don't you belong to any fandom?" I was used to the stares of 'is she nuts?' from the older people, but never from my own generation... looking guy. Poor guy stared at me as if I was nuts.

"Should I answer this?"  
"No need. I guess you're not an Internet person, are you?"  
"I'm more into books." This was just too good.

So, for the past thirty minutes I've been teaching, apparently, Ruki slang words with incorrect meanings. And Reiji got a bit less angry at his student position. Guy to my right just didn't give a damn about his surroundings - he was too busy talking to his scars.

And finally - the bell rang, freeing us from the sex education.  
"And remember, saying 'you are my bae' means 'you are my big-ass enemy'. Don't forget to use everything I taught you. See you later, Ruki."  
"Yeah."

Reiji was waiting for someone near the exit.  
"I must applaud you." He said to me once I was near him.  
"For what?" I didn't stop walking, but he followed me.  
"That mutt got his brains washed out. He will definitely make a fool out of himself."   
"Yeah, that will be hilarious," I giggled.

"But why did you do this?" Reiji asked.  
"He called you unsightly. You are the most sightly and gentlemanly person in this entire school. You might be a huge ass, yes, but sometimes, that little heart of yours melts even a little bit."  
"Stop spouting nonsense."

"I'm not, I mean - when I had my nightmare, you could feed me drugs, but instead of them, you gave me some actual tea. This was my thanks to you." Please buy this please buy this. I did that for two reasons:   
Reason number one - my own satisfaction. Reason number two - to avoid Reiji's punishment. But I said the truth about him - he could be kind, even if his kindness had terms and conditions.

"You just want to avoid the punishment, don't you."   
"That would be a nice bonus." I laughed nervously.  
"I shall grant it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to that you for the feedback, comments and kudos! They make me feel all giddy and happy inside out!


	12. The worst kind of torture

"Ayato, please don't." I learned that I could withstand being whipped. I could handle bites and other sort of torture, but not this.

I've seen Rambo, even Deadpool had an electrified bed scene. And that was exactly where I was tied up to - a bed. It was made in a way that I was in the eye level with Ayato. I wasn't lying down - I was in a standing position in a middle of the dark room. Only one light bulb was hanging above my head, trying its best to provide enough light, but failing.

"Beg some more." Ayato's smirked, ripping away my favorite shirt.  
"Hey! I paid actual money for that shirt!" How dare that bastard?  
"Too bad." Ayato brushed his new toy against my side near the kidney area. My eyes widened as the giggle left my mouth. My entire body tensed up, jerking away from the damn vampire.

Ayato laughed.   
"Wait... Are you ticklish?" He slowly put his both hands on my sides, making sure to run his fingers along my skin. I jumped up at the slightest touch of his fingertips.  
"I'm not." I squealed, trying to suppress my laughter.

Ayato's eyes started to shine in that beautiful crimson red, his face was being slowly corrupted by the sadistic smile.  
"I guess I found something even better, than perrilla bed." My eyes widened.  
"No. No. Don't you dare! Electrocute me! Whip me! Do anything you want but not this!"   
"Try as much as you want - Ore-sama won't change his mind."

Ayato knelt down in front of me and removed my shoes and socks.  
"I promise you I won't even laugh. I will gain complete control over my body and you will see - you will be left with your shattered pride as a torturer, Ayato, you just HAHAHA." He started to tickle my right foot. I wanted to kick him in a face, but my legs were tied down to the metal carcass of the bed. I was laughing so hard the entire bed shook.

"I didn't know you were this sensitive," Ayato smirked.  
"I swear... to god... you will... PAYYY STAHHHP!" My laughter mixed with screams. We were in the dungeons, in the room for torture. Usually, Reiji was the one to bring me there.

Ayato used his room - a second torture room of the house (as far as I know) and Laito preferred public humiliation. But today was different. Today, Ayato's order from the Amazon came and he wanted to try out his new toy - electrified bed. I was just minding my own business in the garden with some snacks and a book, when he pulled me downstairs.

"How about your armpits?" The horror in my face betrayed me immediately.  
"Tickle tickle," Ayato said cheerfully. I had no time to laugh at his enthusiasm and silly voice, because Ayato's fingers were masters at tickle torturing me.

"I'LL TELL MOM ABOUT THIS HAHAHAHA! I'LL TELL REIJI ABOUT YOU!"   
"You still have some strength to threaten me? I think you deserved a punishment." Ayato disappeared for a moment. I was breathing heavily, trying to regain my breath.

"Where did that bastard go?" I tried to look around the room, but my stiff neck didn't allow me to do so.   
"I'm right here," He whispered right into my right ear from behind. Shivers ran down my spine like racing horses. I felt something touch my bare back.

"I've always wanted to try this out." A soft thing slid up and down my spine, making me hit my head against the metal bed. I bit down my lip, trying not to make any sound.

Ayato walked in front of me, revealing a long white feather.   
"A feather? Really?" The good old fashioned tickle monster. I've never been tickled with a feather before but I wasn't really looking forwards to the new experience. Ayato drew a few circles around my belly button, drawing a path to the pits of my arms.

I was shaking my head, when he started to tease my armpits. He slowly made his way up to my neck. Any time now. Any time. Here! The feather got really close to my mouth, so I snatched it away with my teeth. Without waisting another second, I started to chew down onto the white silky thing.   
"Heh, now you mon't be amble to tickle mbe anybore," I said with my mouth full.

Ayato grimaced at the sight.  
"You are a brave one. Ore-sama borrowed this thing from Laito." I instantly stopped moving my jaw. I stood there in shock for a few seconds before spitting the damn thing out.  
Who knows where it has been before. Probably not in a place of my preference.

"What the hell?! Dude, why?"   
"Don't worry - I have a plan B." Ayato pulled out a brush for hair. He then pushed the bed down. It hit the ground with a loud clank.   
"I think I got a concussion." Ayato ignored me and walked towards my feet once again.

"No no no no. Don't." I have never been so afraid of a hairbrush in my life, but there was always a first time for everything. Ayato started to rub my foot with the bristles of the brush.   
"You like it, don't you?" With one hand he was torturing my right foot using the brush and with the other - gently scratching my left one.   
"I... Don't... Please... Stahhp..." I choked out through the laughter.

You hate it, but you're still laughing - this is the kind of torture that sends people mad. Ayato started to laugh himself. He could no longer control himself.  
"Man... You look so... Pathetic." He could barely keep on tickling me (bastard still could though).

"Okay," He giggled, "It's enough for today." I sighed in relief. It was finally over. He walked to my side. I was expecting him to untie me, but he climbed first onto the bed and then on top of me.

He sat right above my knees, his knees resting besides my hips. He squeezed his legs closer together, trapping me completely. I could no longer move from side to side with my hips and I could no longer move my legs. And what was the worst - my sides and armpits were completely exposed to his hungry fingers.

This tickling session lasted for over an hour. I got a sore throat from screaming and he laughed his ass off, while trying to stay on top of me. He even used an electric toothbrush on me. But it all ended with one move that I made.

\------ ------- ------- ------- ------- ------

"Can't believe she passed out." Ayato was leaning towards my neck on all four, when I managed to free one of my legs and bury my knee up his ass, sending him to the ground over the metal headboard. He slammed to the concrete floor face first.

Ayato groaned in pain as he tried to stand up.   
"You fucking bitch." He was walking towards me while holding his bloody nose with one hand and his ass with the other. I was frantically trying to remove myself from the chains, but in wain. Ayato grabbed his original toy - picana and continued to walk towards me.

His electric stick was inches away from my skin. I closed my eyes in a pathetic attempt to escape from reality.  
"Ayato, that's enough." It was Subaru. My dear sweet Subaru came to my rescue.

"Her annoying voice won't let me sleep." Right. He and his sensitive ears. I was really annoyed by this part of Subaru (as if everything else was perfect), but today - I was really glad to have Subaru's sensitive ears nearby.

"I will be done in a moment. Just let me fry her alive."   
"That's a no." Reiji fixed his glasses.   
"As much as I hate her and her cooking skills - she can't die." I wanted to hug Reiji right this moment - I was that mad happy.

"Nfu~ that was a one hell of a rodeo. This horse seems wild, ne~ Mare-chaaan~."  
"Shut up you pervert. Teddy doesn't like this kind of language, right, Teddy?"

"Why are you here? Is this some sort of anonymous fang gathering because you're failing miserably. I know all of your names."

"Hey, Ayato, can I try her out? I saw how she sent you flying. It was a long time since I had a rodeo like that, nfufu~" Laito was watching it?  
"I would enjoy a wild girl like her."

"Not on my watch you won't. Her father might have made such a request, but this is against gentleman's aesthetics." Reiji threw me a life jacket filled with water.

"What do you mean by this? What request?" What were they talking about?  
"Don't you know why you're here?"   
"To be your blood slave?"   
"Nice description, but it's not exactly the real truth."

"Then what is?" Reiji mentioned my father. My parents sent me here after I told them I had a girlfriend. They said that I will be 'healed' here. All I told them was that I didn't want to have kids and I have a nonsexual relationship with a girl I like. What's so bad about it?

It didn't work out with a guy so I found a nice girl... That Laito snatched away. That bastard.   
"So what's this all about?" I asked again.  
"Too bothersome to explain." And now we have the cherry of our pie - Shuu.

"Then why did you come here in the first place?!" He seemed to think for a while, then answered.  
"I just wanted to hear more of your moaning."

"That was not me - that was Ayato when I kicked him in the family bongas. Tsk tsk tsk. Enjoying your brother's moaning. You really are the biggest pervert this planet has ever faced, aren't you?"

And this sucker was trapped in the corner. Shuu's and Laito's hentai wars were ridiculously hilarious... When I wasn't a part of them that is. So, in this way I could force Shuu to admit that he was enjoying what he actually wasn't just to win that bloody nose award. Of course, Shuu would never admit that he was participating in these Hentai Olympics, but Laito was too obvious.

"Hey! Bitch-chan, just so you know, in this very dungeon I witnessed my mother..."  
"AND WE STOP RIGHT HERE!" Yelled Reiji. "Cease your vulgar behavior. It's allowed in your bedroom behind the soundproof doors and not here in the public."

"Whatever, but you will pay for this." Ayato pointed at his bloody, but already healed nose.  
"...And this..." He pointed at his butt.   
"Oh come on, it wasn't that strong of a kick." Ayato just 'Tck'ed' and left.

"What were you doing down here?" Asked Kanato.  
"We were baking a cake, what else could we do in the torture room in the middle of the night." Kanato slowly walked to the whips' table. He gently touched each and every single one, looking for the most painful one.

"Stupid human thinks she can act smart on me." Kanato's lash outs of anger would make even the coolest bikers piss themselves in fear, but calm Kanato in a situation like this probably already made these bikers wash their boxers from the brown spots. While sobbing.  
"K-Kanato, I didn't mean it that way I..."   
"Shhh" He pressed a finger against my lips. "I'm not a savage - I understand how you feel after a night of torture."

"You do?" I couldn't believe my ears, because my eyes were showing the whip in his hand.  
"Laito, my dear brother, help me with this." Kanato walked to the right side of the bed and Laito to the left. Then, they lifted it to the original position.   
"I heard that some girls really enjoy this kind of filthy games, right, Laito?"

"Nfu~ you have no idea how they love this stuff. But some girls prefer delicate things, like feathers." I tensed up at these words.  
"And w-what do y-you usually do with that?" I don't want to know the answer.  
"I... What is it doing here?" Laito walked closer to the white chewed up feather lying on the ground and picked it up.

"What happened to it? And my girls preferred this feather the most. What a shame..."   
"What did you do with it AHHH!" Kanato hit my back with a whip. I was distracted by Laito and didn't notice, how Kanato walked behind me.   
"Scream!" My voice was already hoarse from the time with Ayato, so Kanato was not helping at all.

He hit me again. Even through the holes of the bed base, I could feel my skin bruise in the spots Kanato's whip managed to reach.

"I SAID SCREAM!" Now we finally had the beyond livid Kanato. Bikers were already jumping into the lake full of hippopotamuses just to escape from this angry loli. Kanato wasn't holding back like Reiji would do, oh no - Kanato was hitting me as hard as he could. The force of the whip even snapped open iron net in a few places.

After two more full force hits from a totally pissed off vampire, Reiji stepped in.   
"That's enough."   
I was barely conscious. I was hanging on the bed like a scarecrow. I could barely able to understand my surroundings.

"Snap out of it." Reiji gently pat my cheek.   
"Guess I'll have to give you this." He took out a weird looking bottle, opened it and pushed it under my nose. The scent was so strong it forced my consciousness back immediately.

Reiji untied my legs and one arm.  
"Do it yourself." I did what he said - I untied my other hand.   
"You know the way back." And in an instant - Reiji was gone. And so were everyone else.

I somehow got back to my room, found a book I was previously reading on my nightstand. I took some fresh clothes, some medicine for my new wounds and I got into a shower.

I used to like showers, but now I hated them. Shower just made my wounds sting like hell and they reminded me about my position here. I was nothing but a toy to them. It seemed like a matter of time until I was degraded to the fullest in this household. Did my parents know about this? What was Reiji talking about? I'll call mom later to find out some things, but now - sleep was the king I had to obey.


	13. when the secret is too obvious

I was nervous beyond belief. Who could have thought that calling my own mother would be so hard. I was walking back and forth in my room with the phone in my hands, pressing mom's contact then going back to the entire list. I have been playing like this for over an hour now.

"It's easy, just press the 'call' button and that's it. She's not going to scream at me for calling after a few months. I mean - she will talk to me, right?" I asked myself.

When my mom gets angry - silent treatment might continue for a few weeks. Once, she said nothing to me for an entire month because of something minor. And this thing that happened wasn't minor at all.

"I can do it - it's just a phone call. I won't lose anything by calling, right? Aghhhh WHY IS IT SO HARD?!" I hit my wall a few times. Again. If I continue on doing this - I'll turn into Subaru.

"Come on, fingers, just press the damn button!" But these bastards won't move. Suddenly, my door slammed wide open and a very angry Subaru marched in. Without a word, he walked straight to me, grabbed my phone and pressed the damn button for me.

"What have you done?! I wasn't ready yet!" I yelled at the white beauty (let's face it - all of them look like angels).   
"You've been making these sounds for too long to not be ready! I don't care about your conversation, just get it over with." He was about to walk away, when I grabbed his shirt.

"S-Subaru..."  
"What?"  
"You got me into this - take your responsibility and stay!"   
"Why the hell should I!"  
"To confirm if she's not lying."  
"Go get Reiji."   
"I will listen to THAT song again.  
"..." Subaru walked to my bed and sat down, crossed his arms on his chest and started to wait with a frown.

Phone was already beeping - waiting for mom to answer. Then I heard a click.   
"Hello?" Mom's cheerful voice answered. With a shaking finger I turned on the loudspeaker.  
"Hi, mom." I was nervous, but happy at the same time. I was talking to my mom after such a long time and she was in a good mood.  
"Oh, it's you." Cheerfulness in her voice melted off like a fresh snow in a Russian sauna.

"Yeah, it's me."  
"What do you want?" To talk? To get some comfort? To remember good old times when I was your little girl? To talk about the hell I have to go through in this place on the daily basis? To tell her how much I've missed her, compared to Reiji's, horrible cooking?

"I just wanted to talk about something." I heard an angry sigh.  
"Make it quick - my show is going on."   
"Okay. I wanted to ask, why I was sent where I am right now?"   
"Isn't it obvious? To heal your head."   
"What? Do you really think that there's something wrong with my head?"

"Listen, your cousin Jane has a boyfriend, and another cousin Ana has one." And so does the third one, named John, but you don't know about it, do you?  
"And where are you getting at?"  
"Get a boyfriend and prove that you're normal." I made that 'Excuse you!' face.

"But I am normal!"  
"Don't talk back to me! You don't want to study where we want you to, so get a man. You'll see when you grow old - life without children is dull. We are only trying to help you. You'll thank me after a couple of years - you'll see. Now, choose a guy you like and go start a family. I already want grandkids, you know." Mom's voice started to regain its cheerfulness.  
"I already have a few names picked out. How about..."

"Mom! Hold your horses for a while. What kids?" A sickening feeling was sinking deeper into my stomach.   
"You have to start a family with one of the six guys you live with." Suddenly, world around me got a little bit whiter. I stumbled to my bed.

"But why me? Can't you ask your other child to get a family? He's older that me!"  
"And still studying in university. He's planning to have a career - family would be a bother to him." Who is this crazy woman and where did she put my real mother?

"Is this the truth?" I asked Subaru.  
"Yes." His answer was short.  
"Mom, I'll tell you one thing, so listen closely and remember - as long as I'm alive - you will never have grandkids from my side. Now excuse me - I need to get ready for my funeral." I didn't wait for her answer and hanged up the phone.

"So, you were told to 'heal' me, huh." I chuckled angrily.  
"Yeah, but none of us really wanted to do anything with this situation. That old geezer told us that that was the real reason why you're here. But neither we, nor him really wanted to follow your parents instructions... Except for Laito maybe."

"But let me guess - that's only his nature, right?"  
"Yeah. Because we were told to do it - no one wants to do anything to you in that way, so you're safe at least in that matter. Not even Laito or Ayato did anything serious, right?"   
"Yeah, you're right." Somehow, Subaru cheered me up.   
"Thanks, Subaru." I smiled. The truth was flying at me like a professionally thrown baseball ball, but Subaru hit it away from me.

"No problem. But I got thirsty from all of the talking." He grabbed my wrist.  
"Where's my thank you gift?"   
"I have a smoothie in the fridge?" I tried to get away from his grasp. For a moment I forgot that he was a vampire. How silly of me.

"I don't want that." He pushed me down and pinned my hands above my head. "What I want is right here." He leaned down and licked my neck. I will never get used to this.

Subaru was about to bite me, when he stopped.  
"I know I shouldn't be asking this, but what's wrong?"   
"I... Lost my appetite." He just stood up and walked away. Weird. I also got out of bed and fixed it.

Conversation with mom went quite weird, but hey - at least I knew the truth, right? Right. And there was one nice thing about it - guys won't do it! I felt a bit relieved.

I guess you can count on the vampires when your family lets you down.

But Subaru got a bit weird. I wonder why. I had no time to think about something not relevant, because there were only 30 minutes until school time. If I wanted to keep away from the torture chamber - I had to hurry.

\----- ------- ------- ------- -------- ------

"Guys, sorry for being late." I ran as fast as I could, ignoring the pain in the back and my stomach. That tickle torture session must have exhausted my belly muscles so much they still hurt and my back obviously hurt because of the whip.

"It's okay, Kanato is still not here anyways." Reiji sighed.  
"Who's still not here." Asked a voice from behind me. I jumped in surprise.   
"Oh, Kanato, it's you."   
"Who else could that be if not me, you pathetic creature?"   
"Judging from the way you talk - my mom," I chuckled. He was about to say something, but Reiji just shoved us both into the limo.

"Shut up and get moving."   
"Thank you for the gallant way of getting me into the car." He ignored me and sat down as far away from me as possible.

I took out my NEW earphones and turned on the music. This time I got a seat near the window. If my imagination wasn't fooling me - Subaru also tried to get from me as far as possible.   
"Bitch-chan, why not sit near me, hm?" Laito reached out for my hand.  
"No way! It's Ore-sama's turn!" Ayato grabbed another hand of mine.

"Guys, please." I was not in the mood to be shared today. "Just leave me alone." Laito ignored me and pushed Kanato, who was sitting to my left, away.

"Oh come on, Bitch-chan~ give me one sip." He pulled up my sleeve and was about to bite, but stopped after licking my hand.  
"I know I shouldn't be asking this again, but why won't you bite me?!" What was up with these creeps? First Subaru, now Laito.

"I just... Lost my appetite." He pushed angry Kanato back to his previous seat - next to me. Now I know who's going to bite me - the mister 'How dare you treat me like a doll!'.

Kanato was angry, he was frustrated, he was holding a knife and that knife was holding my eye as its hostage.  
"K-Kanato, EYE see you are upset about something EYE didn't do, but let's not make anything eyelash." The tip of Kanato's knife was millimeters away from my eyeball.

"Kanato," Said Reiji. "You can kill her."  
"OKAY OKAY, I'll stop with the puns, okeye." I had to stop myself from laughing, because I would have pierced my own eye with that hungry tip of the knife.

"Oh, come on Reiji, let her have her moment. Can't you see that these eye puns are not so bad." I giggled. I know - when you're looking right at the eyes of danger, you should be wetting your pants, but I already knew that I'll never leave this place alive, so why bother and ruin this beautiful car seat with yellow stains?

I took my eyes off of the knife tip and took a look at Kanato's eyes. I was surprised by what I saw there. His eyes were big and round and the colour reminded me of purple anemones. It felt like two big angry flowers were staring straight into my soul.

"Beautiful..."  
"What did you just say?" Ayato asked.  
"Kanato, your eyes are really beautiful." His grip of my collar loosened. Kanato's eyes got even bigger in surprise. His face was no longer twisted in anger and his knife was nowhere to be seen.

"Well, I guess you can live for now."  
"And I think you will be my Instagram model after all."  
"What?"  
"Just wait for the summer."

"Tck, how dare you ignore me for so long!" Upsy daisy - I forgot about the royal pain in the soft spot.  
"Ayato, I wasn't ignoring you - I was just keeping you away from the headache." Kanato would have been really troublesome.  
"Don't lie to me! I need your apologize. Give me your blood."

He didn't wait for my agreement and just pulled me towards him. Ayato roughly pushed away my hair from my neck and licked it in preparation of a bite. But that was it. Only one lick and I was pushed back to my seat.

"Guys, what the hell! If you bite me - fucking bite me!" I was getting really sick of this treatment.  
"I just..."  
"Don't tell me you no longer have an appetite, Ayato. I dare you to bite me! Come on! Third time in a row? What's wrong with all of you? Did you get a vampire flu or something?"

Shuu just chuckled.   
"You will find out soon enough yourself."   
"What do you..."  
"We're here. All of you - leave this vehicle at once." Growled Reiji.

\------ -------- -------- --------- --------

"Hey, Ruki, how is it going?"   
"Nice and clean, how about you?"  
"My experiment seems to not work."   
"You should use a little bit of this and heat up some of that." Ruki, my chemistry partner for a day, was pointing his finger at the substances I still needed to add.

"You know, this would also work with your blood. Would you like me to get some?" He picked my hand up and was about to bite my finger, but you guessed it - he stopped.  
"Let me guess - no appetite?"   
"You're not as stupid as you usually are."   
"Thank you... Hey!"  
"Sorry, my mistake - you are as stupid as always."

Did I somehow get some anti vampire powers? Three Sakamaki brothers tried to bite me, but changed their minds, then we get Mukami brothers. All three of them 'lost their appetite' while facing me.

Now, I will go through my last period - PE and go home. All I have to do is survive the pain I was feeling in my back and belly.

And unfortunately for today - we had to do the stupid power work-out. Six sets of ten crunches, ten push-ups and so on. And of course - the day wouldn't be finished without meeting all of the Mukami brothers. So the last one and the best one of the brothers was left for the end - Yuma. He also had PE. I already did my sit-ups, so I had to do ten pull-up. But there was a problem.

"Hey, shorty, can't reach the bar?" Snickered very very tall Yuma.  
"No, I'm just intimidating my enemy. Look - the bar is starting to shake in fear."

"That's not the bar - that's you. Come here." He just grabbed me by my sides and lifted me up.

"What are you... Hey! Let me down!"  
"Hold on to it. There. And now do some pull-ups. Hurry." I was hanging on it like a fish on a hook - helpless in pain and... to my horror - bleeding!

"Yuma, I'm not screwing around - get me down!" Sometimes it felt like a false danger, sometimes hot air and bad food tricked you into believing that you were on your days, but this time I just knew it - I had a big problem.

"You damn rotten male - get me down!"   
"What's all of this commotion about? I can bite you right here right now for the things you said, you know." Yuma walked closer to me and I felt him touch my thighs.

"DON'T TOUCH ME YOU FREAK." I kicked him in the face. He almost fell down on his butt. When Yuma regained his balance - he was so angry I could feel it in my bones.

"You little bitch, now I really will bite you and I don't care about the audience." I felt his hands on my thighs. He was about to bite me, when suddenly, Yuma took me off of that bar.

"Don't tell me you lost your appetite."   
"Something like that. Shouldn't you be leaving or something?" I will find out how he knew it later, but now I needed to reach the bathroom.   
"I should." I walked straight to my PE teacher, who was unfortunately a male.

"Sir, can I go to the bathroom." God, may this dense male teacher get an enlightenment and allow me to leave.  
"You can't leave now. Couldn't you go before lesson started?" Oh my God, I will make sure to go straight to hell so I can never see you for what you have done to me.

"But I really have to go, you know... Girly... Stuff..." I said through clenched teeth. How could this creature call himself PE teacher if he didn't even know about female body!

"Sir, you should really let her go. Unless you want things to get really messy on this white gymnastics mat.  
"She's an adult - she can hold it in." I literally facepalmed and so did Yuma. Can I punch my teacher in the nose and ask him to hold in his blood?

Yuma walked to me and slapped me pretty hard without saying anything.   
"Dude, what the..."  
"Sir, she needs to go to the nurse - I think I gave her a concussion or something."   
"What?! Okay, you may go. And Yuma - you caused her injury - you get her to the nurse's office." When I walked out of the gym - I started to run towards the bathroom.

"Don't slip on your..."  
"Shut up you pervert!"   
"Is this how you thank me?!"   
"You slapped me! We're even!"   
"Okay. Good luck with your aunt red."  
"DON'T SAY THAT!"

\------- ------- ------- ------- ------ ------

I was standing in a hot shower. This day was a tragedy in so many ways. It all started with a conversation with mom, then my lava days started in a middle of the PE class. If it wasn't for Yuma - I would have been known as Bloody Mary. Oh, that brings me to another few bad things - that bastard knew about my red nightmare! But that was not the worst encounter of the day, oh no - the worst one was when I figured out that I had no supplies.

I didn't have my female curse days for a few months because of the blood loss and bad diet (Reiji is not always in a mood to cook), so I had no supplies. Who could have thought that my body got used to this kind of lifestyle.

So I had to use toilet paper for my trip to the nurse office. And of course - the nurse of the day was mister Reinhart - another male. It felt like all of the females had died out and left me all alone in my misery.

I walked in without knocking. Reinhart stopped writing and raised his head to meet my eyes.  
"Oh, isn't here..."   
"I don't have time for the chit chat."  
"You want to get rid of that bruise from your face?"

"No. There's something more serious."  
"Ah, I see. Come here and I will let you choose the supplies you need."   
"How did you..?"

"Only one thing can distract a girl from her bruised face. I'm not your PE teacher - I do understand young girls just fine." I didn't know how to feel about it - relieved or creeped out.

I took what I needed and got the hell out of there. The trip home was really silent - I didn't dare to look at anyone, because I was too afraid to show that something was not usual about me. But the guys didn't bother me for some reason.

When we got home, I ran straight to the shower. What, if they could sense I was having my female struggle days. What, if it had the same effect as blood to the sharks? I was even trying to finish my hot, steaming shower as fast as I could so they wouldn't get inside the bathroom.

But no one came. I changed into my comfy pyjamas, grabbed my hot water bottle and walked straight to my bed. I did try to find a nice pose, but in vain. No matter how hard I was trying to lay down in a comfortable position - pain just kept on getting worse.

"Curse this life of mine." I curled up in a ball.  
"Ouch ouch damn it why me?" I think that ripping out my reproduction organs wouldn't hurt as much as the cramps I was having right now.   
"Isn't it a view good enough to eat." My eyes shot wide open. What was Shuu doing here?! I hid the hot watter bottle under my covers and tried to act normal.

"What do you mean? What view?"  
"This pained expression of yours."  
"Oh this? I just ate something bad - that's it." They can't know about this. They just can't.   
"The way females suffer just because they are females is adorable." He knew! I'm doomed.

"What do you mean? I am not..."  
"There's no reason to lie - all of us could sense it even before it started."  
"So there really is no privacy in this house, huh. But I have another question, why didn't any of you drink my blood?"

"Too lazy to explain." He got into the bed right beside me. His movements were unusually rough and the jumping of the bed caused even more pain for me.

"Owwy. At least tell me a little bit." I poked his cheek. "Come on - I won't let you sleep." Shuu sighed.  
"Your body has a self defense mechanism against vampires when having you cycle - there's a hormone that makes our thirst disappear. And your blood would also taste really bad because of it."

"Good job, mother nature! Owwww it hurts." Shuu just chuckled at my moans of pain. After some more suffering - I finally fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading, leaving kudos and commenting! Your love means so much!


	14. Hey, death, wanna play?

Today was a good day - owls were hooting, wolves were howling and school was closed down because of the winter break. As happy as I was to stay home and watch anime - I couldn't. Reiji figured out the best punishment for me - turning off the wifi. The good old dreadful method that all parents and assholes use.

"I'm so bored. What should I do?" I huffed and puffed out of boredom. No Internet meant no access to my life and that meant I felt as empty as a potato chips bag. Quite pathetic, I know, but hey - I was happy with this kind of Internet life. Even though it highly depended on the quality of the wifi.

But I needed to do something - I couldn't just lie around all day on all possible surfaces like a cat. A good old ancient method to kill boredom will do it.

"To the library!" I pointed up my index finger with an entire arm stretched out. I excitedly ran out of my room just to realize one thing.  
"Where the hell is it?"

I couldn't believe that I have been living here without knowing where the Sakamaki's library was. They had a pool after all, so they must have a room dedicated for books that Reiji weren't living in.

So I had no other choice but to ask someone for directions. And that someone had to be Reiji himself.

*knock* *knock*

"Reiji-san, may I come in?" After hearing a muffled 'Out of all times...' I carefully opened the door. I put a hand over my eyes just in case and walked in with my stretched out hand waving in front of me.

"I'm sorry to disturb you at such moment, but can you tell me where the library of this house is?" I tried to find my usual chair without knocking off anything that can shatter and turn into a torture device.

"I am sincerely not interested in the answer, but I just have to ask. Why are you walking like that?"  
"Like what like that?" I blindly followed Reiji's voice.  
"Why are you covering your eyes?"   
"To give you your privacy."  
"If that's the case, why are you in my room then?"  
"This girl has one question that only you can answer."

"Uncover your eyes."   
"Are you sure? I won't see anything... weird... Right?"  
"I will gut you if you try to think about me that way again. Now do it - I don't want you to destroy anything." Reiji said.

I did what he said. I opened my eyes just to see a fully dressed (thank goodness), tired and pissed off Reiji still working on his mixtures.

Once upon a time there was a little girl who wanted to borrow you know whose fedora for some dancing to Michael Jackson and Madonna. She was so excited about the idea she ran into the room without giving another thought about it. The sight she saw changed her forever.

Ever since then, the little girl always knocked before entering someone's bedroom, especially if she heared weird sounds coming out of the room.

Seeing Laito only in socks, white shirt and fedora already dancing to Michael Jackson was a traumatizing experience after all.

"So what do you you want?" Reiji's angry voice brought me back to reality.  
"Yeah, right. Where is the library?"  
"In front of Kanato's room."   
"Why is reading an extreme sport in this household? No. Don't answer. That was a rhetorical question."  
"I'm surprised you know what that word means," Reiji chuckled.

"Oh come on, I might look stupid, act stupid, talk stupid and be stupid, but I'm not that stupid. I just really like that vein of yours popping out whenever I do something stupid."

Reiji sighed.  
"Leave. Now."   
"Aye, sir!" I ran out of the room just to come back.

"What now?"   
"Where's Kanato's room again?" Reiji-san was kind enough to push me towards the direction of Kanato's room. Let's note that Reiji's room was on a second floor and Kanato's was on the first.

That was a one hell of a trip, but I previously had a lot of practice with stumbling down stairs so I knew how to regain my balance with only breaking off two nails. No broken bones this time!

And here it was - the dream of every girl that falls in love with a beast. The little heaven of someone who likes creating comfy atmosphere with tea and sweets. Yes - it was Kanato's room. And in front of it was library.

I walked inside to find something stunning - lots of books. Yes. Books. In the library. Everywhere. Wow. So impressive. Like really. No kidding.

I started searching for something interesting, like a magical book or a diary that would prove someone was adopted, but I found something arguably better - a game of Monopoly.

"I wonder what it's doing here."  
"A previous bride brought it here."  
"AAARGH LAITO WHAT THE FUZZLET?!" Two things I will never get used to: English dubbed anime after watching the original and these damn vampires appearing out of nowhere.

"Nfu~ Did I startle you, Bitch-chan?"  
"I was only thinking about stuff. More importantly, would you play this?"   
"I know a much better game, Bitch-chan~ It's called 'How much can you take until you..."

"Yeah yeah cough up blood and die chocking on something disgusting." I put my palm on Laito's approaching face and pushed it away from me. "I'm serious. I want to play this game." Now he eyed me with sincere curiosity.

"Why would you want to play it?"  
"Have you ever slowly crushed someone's spirit to fight on surviving? Have you ever seen someone's face twist in anxiety and shame as they were paying you the very last bits of their belongings? Have you ever wanted to emotionally crush your brothers? If yes - this game is perfect for you."

"I think this time I will play what you want, Bitch-chan." One man in, five left to pursue.

We left the library and headed towards the nearest vampire - Shuu, who probably was sleeping in the living room.

"The closest one is Shuu."   
"But Kanato-kun's room is right here," Said Laito.  
"I said - the closest one is Shuu." Who is in the mood to die today? Me! But not yet though.

"Don't you think that by getting Kanato hyped up about this game will instantly force others into playing? Who would want to refuse a screaming psycho?" I stopped in my tracks.

"Laito - you're a genius. Kinda rude one towards your brother, but still a genius." I slowly turned around to face Kanato's door.

"Okay, mister Genius. How are we going to do it thought?"   
"Offer your blood for a winner."  
"Like you can't get it without a game. What's a better way to get Kanato into playing?"

"Blackmail," Laito smirked, probably prepared to threaten Teddy.  
"I don't really think it's a great idea after all. Maybe we should gather all of them in one place and then make them to play."

"Nfu~ and what are you suggesting?"   
"You'll see."

We walked to the living room. Without waisting another moment I let my throat do the work.

"Oh Laito! You're the best player I've ever seen! There is no one as good as you..!"  
"I beg you pardon! Ore-sama is the best! By the way, what game are we talking about?" Two in - four left.

"Ayato! Wanna play?"  
"Of course I want to crush you. What are we going to play?"  
"Good. Now wait a bit - we need more players. Ahem... Oh no! What have I done! I can't believe I spilled my green nail polish on the sofa! Again!"

"You will lick it clean! Again!" Reiji's voice boomed behind me like a thunder.

"Hello, Reiji-san. Before you decide to rip away my nails one by one I'd like to ask you: would you like to play a game?"   
"I don't sense that stench. Were you lying?" His angry gaze left me with chills.

"Yes, I was. But I did it because I wanted to play with you. Can we play this together?" I raised the box to show Reiji the game.  
"I am not interested in stupid human games."

"I thought so. Ayato, you were right - this silverware otaku really is scared of being crushed in a human game."  
"What are you saying? I never..."  
"Yes," I cut Ayato off, "You never thought that Reiji-san of all people would refuse such challenge. Especially when Shuu agreed to play..."

"I'll have the bank." Reiji snatched away the box from me.   
"You know the rules?"  
"Do you think I'm an idiot?" Honestly? Right now? At this moment? I sure as hell did think you were an idiot, Reiji. Shuu wasn't even here. Three in - three left.

"SUBARU!!! YOU'RE EITHER PLAYING WITH US OR I WON'T STOP YELLING!!!" Nothing. "I WILL PLAY MY MUSIC!!!" No response. "I WILL SING!"

"NO!" Yelled Subaru and Kanato in unison. Two birds with one shot, I see.  
"Do you agree to play with us?"   
"Teddy, look - stupid human is trying to blackmail us into playing."

"I was trying to sleep," Growled Subaru. I could smell danger. It smelled like a hand around my neck.

"Kanato, you like games, don't you? I found one that we'll be able to enjoy. I even have prizes for the ones that'll play." His eyes lit up in an instant.  
"What prizes?"

"Chocolate ones. But all of us have to play. Not even a single person can be left behind." Kanato turned around to face Subaru.

"If you don't play I will scream until my throat starts to bleed." Subaru, knowing that he wouldn't be getting any sleep anyways agreed to play. Five in - one left.

"Where's that good-for-nothing? I thought you said he agreed."   
"Un momento, señor." I walked behind the couch, then checked under the table. Nothing.  
"I think he might be here... Found him!" Shuu was sleeping on the windowsill behind the curtains.

"Shuu." I poked his cheek. "Would you like to play?"  
"Too bothersome." His answer was unexpected. Really. Never would I ever have thought that he was not into playing a silly game.

"Shuu, if you play Monopoly with us, I will wear that dress you brought me."  
"Not worth it."

"Come on, Shuu, just imagine Reiji's face once he loses against you."  
"Not interested."

"I will shave your hair in your sleep if you don't play."  
"Go ahead. And don't forget to shave off the curly ones."

"But all of your hair are straight... Ohhh." I took a step back.

I walked closer to Reiji.  
"Mom, dad is refusing to spend some time with his daughter!"   
"Seriously Shuu, aren't you supposed to be a better parent to our... What the hell are you saying?!" Reiji snapped at me. Yep, he did look like an idiot to me.

"Kanato-nii! Let's annoy dad until he doesn't refuse." I ran to Kanato.  
"I don't like the way you said it, but Teddy agrees with you."

"Uncle Laito advices you to listen to these two brats," Laito told Shuu.  
"Will you stop with this nonsense if I play?"  
"Obviously," I smiled.   
"Fine then - I'll play."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the first part of Monopoly arc! Hopefully you'll enjoy it!


	15. Fangnopoly

"Yay! We're gonna play like a big and happy family that you guys aren't. I'll go get some snacks!"  
"NO!" Their panic-stricken voice boomed in the room as I started to walk towards the kitchen.   
"I will prepare the snacks. You can help me if you want to." Said Reiji while making his way towards the Heaven of the stomach.

"Guys if you could be kind and set up the game I would be really grateful," I said cheerfully while making my way behind Reiji. "I'll make sure to bring some really good treats for you all."

Once we came back, we started playing. The first thing we had to do was roll the dice to set up the order of the players. I was lucky enough to get twelve and Kanato was unlucky enough to get the Snake Eyes.

"That's bullshit! I want to be the first one to roll! Why does the trash like you have to be the first one?!"  
"Now now, Kanato, calm down. It's not that bad to be the last one. Ore-sama only got eleven, see?" Laughed Ayato. He sure was enjoying his eleven but one thing made me giggle even more - Reiji was also really upset with his three.

"Reiji, what's wrong? I thought you were good at human games. I thought that this game wouldn't be a challenge for someone like you with the brains of a genius and style of a butler."  
"Nfu~ now now, Bitch-chan, no need to anger our little brother."

"Since when am I your little brother? Even though you are older than Ayato and Kanato, I am your..."  
"Yeah yeah yeah, no need to measure your age and whatever else the word 'little' implies."Reiji eyed me with disgust and Shuu just chuckled.

"Oh yeah, speaking of which: visually Subaru is younger than me but he's a vampire who is old enough to call himself my great-great-grandpa. So, who is the real senpai? Subaru, based on the age or me, based on the position in the school?"

"Enough with this blabbering! Are we playing or not?!" Subaru was getting impatient.   
"Okay okay since we already know the order of the players I think we should pick out the tokens we're going to play with."

"Finally a good idea," Ayato's eyes lit up with life. "Since Ore-sama isn't the first one to roll the dice I'll be the first one to choose!" You know what they say - give the idiot its way.

"Of course you can be the first one to choose." I said in a voice people use for babies. Ayato sat up straighter to make himself look royal.  
"As the best one of this household I will be the knight on the horse." He placed his token on the board.

"Do they have teddies?"   
"I'm sorry, but I don't think they have this kind of thing, but you can be a cannon," I offered Kanato, hoping he wouldn't turn into an actual one.

"Okay, I'll accept this." I sighed in relief. Kanato was in a good mood... For now.

"It's stupid. Does our token make any difference?"   
"No, Subaru, but don't you want to choose something you prefer?"   
"No."  
"I agree with the youngster," Grumped Shuu.  
"Okay, then I'll choose for you." I smirked evilly. Oh this is going to be fun.

"Oh~ Bitch-chan is going to choose something for us~ I can't wait!"  
"Hold your horses, boy," I said while giving Laito his token, "And your hat." Laito stared down at his palm with a small version of his fedora.

"Bitch-chan, you sure are original."   
"Suck it up, will ya. When I played with my friends..."   
"You had friends?!" Ayato gaped in fake surprise.

"Let me finish! As I said, when I played with my friends, we used to go with wrong tokens once in a while, so I figured I should make an association with you and your tokens to not mess up with a game. I mean, once we know that your piece is a hat, Subaru will definitely not mix it with his car." I smiled as I put a tiny car on Subaru's palm.

"You didn't just..." Now Ayato's jaw was wide open in real surprise.  
"Oh what if I did?"  
"What's that supposed to mean?" Subaru clenched his fist as if trying to crush the poor car.

"Subaru-kun, we have something to tell you - there's a car brand with the same name as yours." Laito put his hand on Subaru's shoulder in a comforting way as if Laito just told husband his entire family had gone into a fatal car crash. That car being Subaru.

"And in other news, Subaru and Laito have discovered water is wet! Enough with this. Reiji, you should be a hot iron."  
"Why? What are you trying to imply?"   
"Definitely not that you're hot. You just like doing household chores that's all."

"I thought you should be that, since you're so flat," Ayato snickered.  
"It's a shame Monopoly has no Ken dolls, since you have no..." But Subaru's smack on the head stopped me from finishing my sentence.  
"Don't start anything you wouldn't want to end."

"Based on her logics, Bitch-chan should be a bitch-chan," Laito put the little dog on the 'Go' field.   
"May I protest?"   
"No." Said Subaru and Reiji in unison.

"Okay, fine. Last but not least - Shuu. You will be a shoe."  
"It's not a shoe - it's a boot."  
"Same thing. Okay now, since we already set up the game, let's start."  
"Yea!" Ayato answered hyped up. "But no one actually told us the rules."

"Reiji, the pleasure is all yours." While Reiji was explaining how to play, I gave everyone their money.

"And this is how we declare a winner." Reiji closed the rule book. Everyone, including me, were barely conscious - Reiji's voice would perfectly fit for the lullabies.

Suddenly, I remembered one rule to include.   
"Guys, there's one more rule!"   
"But I read an entire book out loud, there's no way I've missed it."  
"Hush, this rule is unique and only for you, immortal vampires. You can't kill or show any kind of violence or destructive behavior. And no blood sucking."

"What if we won't obey, hm?" Laito wrapped his hands around my waist and pulled me into his lap.   
"Then," I said while struggling away from his hands, "the guy who committed a fraud will automatically lose and will have to give away everything they had to his victim." I finally managed to crawl away from the pervert as far away as possible.

Our table was round. Reiji was sitting to Laito's right. I was in front of Reiji. Between me and Reiji was Ayato. To my right was Subaru and to his right was Kanato. Shuu was in between Laito and Kanato. To put it in a simple way - the circle of players clockwise goes like this: Reiji (12), Laito, Shuu, Kanato, Subaru, me, Ayato and Reiji again.

"So, let's begin!" I said cheerfully. Kanato passed me the dice. Here it was - the very first move I made. I had to leave an amazing first impression to show these suckers that Miss Luck was on my side today.

"Four 

"Four." I stared at the board for a while unable to believe what I saw.   
"Come on, pay the taxes." Boys were laughing their asses off. I got an urge to lose right there right then by ripping out their shiny white fangs.

"Now it's Ore-sama's turn!" Ayato reached out for the dice, but I slapped his hand away.   
"Hold your horse right there for now! Don't you see that I got a double? It's still my turn."

"Haaa?! Stop cheating!"   
"I'm not! Weren't you listening to the rules?"  
"Do I look like an idiot who would?"   
"Ayato, Teddy tells you to shut up and give her the damn dice." Thank you, Kanato.

"Fine. Here." He threw them at my face. I could fake an injury like a Spanish football player, but that would be too low... For now.

"Okay, here I go again." I threw them on the board. One fell with a few rolls to stop at the number three. The other was rolling around for a longer time. It was making me nervous. Dice was teasing me like a basketball player was being teased by the ball that refused to fall through the rim. And then, it finally slowed down to reveal its number - three.

"Another double!" I happily moved my dog to the jail visitor's position.   
"Bitch-chan~ who are you visiting? Is it your boyfriend, because I can also commit a crime by stealing your heart." Cheesy pick-up lines? Come on.

"Actually, I'm visiting my uncle. He's got one year in prison for castrating the last guy that made a move on me." I smiled innocently as I checked my phone. "Oh look - he's getting released tomorrow. Should I call him here for a visit?"

"Yeah no. Just throw your damn dice again." Said Subaru, impatiently waiting for the game to end.  
"Oki doki! Look at how professionals play." With a smug smile I let my dice go.


End file.
